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I like it, but I don't think it needs a quieter part as much as it needs a break in the rhythm. At one point you, around 1:30 you started to change the rhythm and I was expecting this, but then you changed your mind and continued with the same thing. You have the place and the beginning of the change, go with it. JMO.
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"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." Albert Einstein
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