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Ok,
Of all you attempts I liked this one the most when it came to what was visually going on with the combination of motifs. However, when it came to what it sounded like it was another matter. I do understand that the material was limited (which is part of the exercise) but in all cases think about your interval relationships when either constructing a melody, motif(s), or combining motivic ideas. You want the ear to be lead in a certain manner, and how the ear is musically led is up to you.
Think about this when constructin your own melody. Also, your own melody need not be of a grand creation. Something that uses various motivic ideas with attention to some rhythm and relationship between intervals. So, take your time and make sure you create something that you will want to work with.
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