Thank you, Nico, for commenting and suggesting. I agree that the beginning can be more harmonically "obscure"--less "sharp," to better fit the rest of the piece. I might alter that at some point in the future--perhaps when the other mvts. are completed, since it will open the piece. I also agree that the themes are very short-lived: only 2 or 3 phrases, on average (except for the last dotted figure). I thought about going back and expanding, but that would take some major re-thinking of the pacing of the piece. Since it worked as it was, I decided to write off the "deprived" feeling as a support for the mood of despair that I was going for.
I actually think, in that sense, that the "shortness of breath" does contribute positively.