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I as well couldn't hear the 1 2 3 and the reason is probably because you haven't taken note of strong/weak beats.
I actually quite liked bar 9 but I felt bar 13 was too much for me.
With the pulse, it's already lost on the first beat of the second bar. It's also not helped by the fact that the following notes in the bass cleff are on weaker beats. If you can really get an Oom-Pa-Pa feel at the beginning then I guess you'd be excused for making it less obvious in the middle of the piece. But to call it a waltz people really do expect you to have an obvious 3/4 beat.
That being said, I do enjoy your main theme and I really like bar 5. Well done!
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