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I'm wondering if you have ever tried to modify it so the bass enters on the Dominant per the exposition rules, then keep the same (rhythmic) changes in key you've done from there.
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No, I never have. I tend not to revise pieces once I deem them finished, rather allowing them to serve as a evidence of who I was as a composer at that particular point in time - warts and all. I'm going to look more closely at your comment when I get home, and perhaps just for the sake of edification, I may try to re-write the bass entrance; it's the only thing marring an otherwise satisfying movement. I would still want to end up at the same place for the pedal point because I rather like the tension built up and resolved there, but with a quick modulation, that's likely quite possible.
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On the whole, I enjoyed this music, btw.
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I'm glad! I decided not to post the whole Mass here because YC people don't really pay much attention to choral music, for whatever reason, and also because this is a rather personal religious expression.
I don't know if you're familiar with Mozart's early Masses written in Salzburg, but this Missa Brevis is built on that model. The Archbishop was a rather secular clergyman and didn't like to spend much time saying Mass, so he gave directions to Mozart that his settings for the Canon of the Mass should in their entirety take up no more than "a quarter of an hour." They're also scored for relatively modest forces, though festively arrayed: mixed chorus with soloists, 2 trumpets, timpani, 2 violins and continuo - also the scoring of my piece. Mine differs from Mozart's primarily in that I have not set the
Credo , on account of it not being liturgically feasible nowadays; I was trying for a setting at once artistic and viable liturgically.
Incidentally, this Agnus Dei was written while I was recovering from an appendectomy. Go figure.