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Something strange happening, Im of key almost instantly, What key is it?
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Well you start in E min, and by the last measure you wind up in B min: there's really nothing wrong with that and the chord progression that got you there, it's actually quite nice!
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I'm not satisfied with this attempt, apart from the key issue the music is incoherent to my taste. If you know were I've gone wrong, please help.
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The only thing I'd really say is that after the intial entrances, you place the melody in the soprano and lose the contrapuntal feel (it's kinda homophonic, melody with chords), but thats not too bad; you can break out of that easily. Besides that, its pretty solid.
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I just abandoned this particular efford
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Oh come on! This subject is very nice! Keep working with it, I'm sure it'll turn out for the best!