Here I am again

So this is a piece I wrote while sitting in a starbucks. I was really annoyed at how the table looked so I wrote about that. I then also figured out I hated how the whole place looked, but could do nothing to change it so it pissed me off some more. So thats the idea heres the piece.

Haha! Not annoyed at the prices though? I'll take Tim Hortons over Starbucks any day (for those of you who know what that is, (1) I'm sure you'll back me up and (2) how ya doing?!?!?).

Anyway, the piece...

It wasn't quote-on-quote "beautiful" but then again I don't think you were striving for pure beauty in the Puccini sense. In this regard you achieved your goal and what more can you ask for from music? I think the piece could use some work overall, but again, I also think it achieves its goal of converying your anger at the shit we all call Starbucks!

SO I decided to rework on this piece. I would like some suggests on it. I am aware of the repetitive nature of the piece itself though

Isn't Tim Horton's a Canadian donut/doughnut place?