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Old Jun 15 2008, 12:40 AM

Composer
Group: Members
Joined: 29-January 06
Posts: 34
Member Number: 504
Hey there

Hi there I composed a group of songs in a suite called Time. Here are the finished ones. The song 'time' was played last spring at my high school concert. It was cool to hear it in real life rather than the midis. I have the real version but i can't upload mp3s here so if you want to hear it just let me know and I can send it thanks
Attached Files
File Type: mid Far Away.mid (17.8 KB, 13 views)
File Type: mid Past.mid (10.1 KB, 2 views)
File Type: mid The Greatest Day.mid (15.1 KB, 3 views)
File Type: mid The Last Year.mid (13.1 KB, 4 views)
File Type: mid The Passing Hours.mid (14.3 KB, 2 views)
File Type: mid Time-Cut.mid (10.4 KB, 9 views)

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Old Jun 19 2008, 5:54 PM

Composer
Group: Members
Joined: 29-January 06
Posts: 34
Member Number: 504
hey I worked hard on these I just want some feedback or advice (good or bad) I see another thread 50 ppl looked at but no one posted??!?!
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Old Jun 19 2008, 6:20 PM

tenor10's Avatar

Vocalist/Composer
Group: Members
Joined: 1-July 07
Posts: 743
Member Number: 3100
Ok first off I had/still have this problem. You should comment on others works and maybe people will return the favor. Try it.


A score would be nice to look at....

So overall they were nice.... but they sounded too much a like. I felt like I was listening to variations of the same piece. Listening to them as a set might get a little....boring....(sorry) I didnt hate the music, just together as a whole it could use some work.
Nice job, it has a lot of potential, i love the idea and the titles are really cool, I just think you could do a lot more with it.

Good luck!!
Scott.
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Old Jun 19 2008, 9:49 PM

aneapolitanwouldwork's Avatar

or perhaps an Aug6
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Joined: 19-June 08
Posts: 28
Member Number: 4969
Orchestration for these? String Ensemble? And score. Don't expect a lot of comments without a score, except for ones asking you to put one up.

Far Away -
I like the ideas. A bit of lack of rythmic variety.
I like it. I don't, however, get a 'far away' feeling, either in distance or nostalgia.

Past -
A lot of the same ideas, some parallels.
This one feels more nostalgic, but in the way that an old man is randomly recounting memories. Not too much direction, but they are all put on the table. No motif you return to?

The Greatest Day -
Once again very similar parallels in the upper voices with chords in the lower.
I think when all the voices decend together, it stands out a lot from the rest of the piece. By now, the audience will be wanting some kind of rythmic or melody or style change to break the cycle up, but you haven't really given them it yet.

The Last Year -
Tempo slowed, but we still get the same sounding chords with solo movement either in the top voice (or parallel top voices) or in the bass. Question and answer style.
Feel free to surprise the audience a bit.

The Passing Hour -
Sounds a lot like the first. Repeated Chords with solo voice over the top.
Having chords in quarters, halves, and wholes, and a melody in quarters and eighths only gets a bit monotonous after five movements.
Still a lot of parallel. At the end, ends very very similarly to the first movement.

Time-Cut
I like this one the best. As a stand alone. But once again, all comments regarding your style stay the same. This movement would not stand out as a final movement after you just performed 5 movements that sound fairly similar to this. A couple times in the 3rd minute you do little trill-esque things! Yay a little bit of sticky-out melody!
Your ending could be a lot more epic, especially after a 6 movement piece. Either more painful and dying away, or real piece-ender. I am more inclined to go with the former.

Good style though, I like it. What you really have is a 24 minute movement with no real development section. Throw in some real movment variation, and it will be an excellent piece. I enjoyed listening.

Cheers, Brian.
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Old Jun 19 2008, 10:44 PM

Maestro
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Joined: 30-July 07
Posts: 23
Member Number: 3282
I definitely agree with the above commentators, I would love to hear some variety and variation. The ideas are good, the melodies are there... Mess around with it! Musicians (composers being under that category as well) are artists of their trade. If you're an artist, you have to make something that stands out from the rest. Right now, you're on the right track, you just have to make it stand out...
Great job, and don't stop!
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Old Jun 21 2008, 8:58 PM

Composer
Group: Members
Joined: 29-January 06
Posts: 34
Member Number: 504
Hey guys thanks for all the comments I agree that time is the best song. I think I want to pursue that one in terms of seeing what I can do with it. When it was played at the spring concert it was pretty amazing. I guess for the other songs, I wanted to keep the same "type" of music as the time piece and it ended up being all the same in a way. i don't want to change them so they are so different but they do seem to have the same template. Since someone said that the ending of time could have been better, I think the full song has a better ending. The piece was cut b/c it was too long when it was performed.
Attached Files
File Type: nwc Time-Full.nwc (3.5 KB, 0 views)
File Type: mid Time.mid (13.1 KB, 0 views)
File Type: mid Time-Cut.mid (10.4 KB, 0 views)
File Type: nwc Time-Cut.nwc (3.0 KB, 0 views)

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