Short piece for string orch - Smjörið er Brætt

I wrote this piece within a two day time span (as a gift for my (favorite) orchestra teacher who will be going off to grad school next year), after a writer's block of over two months. So finally I presented her with this and now she wants the orchestra to perform the piece. So I'm happy to get my first real performance in front of a real audience.

Anyway, this piece is only about 2.5 minutes in length, but it was my first real attempt at dividing a piece into discreet but related sections. I chose to use a lot of unusual tonality (the most severe in m. 12), and the melodies were partly inspired by eastern-European tunes with a lot of influence from Bartok.

About the title -- This one is in Icelandic, but I don't know exactly what it would translate to. I chose such an unusual title because it looked interesting. so... there you go.

Err... Please let me know what you think. Comments and criticism--both good and bad--would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

MP3: http://www.elliotrogers.com/content/...therbraett.mp3
Score (Sibelius) is attached.

This is a nice piece. You are right, at times, the tonality does sound a bit odd (Espically in the opening measrues and again near the middle) and you do use a fair amount of chromaticism throughout. I hesitate to call this original but something about this does strikes me as different than what I'm used to hearing around and diversity is always welcome. Out of curosity, what samples did you use for this piece? They aren't the best, some of the higher notes seem a bit harsh on my ears and I don't care much for the pizzacato strings but overall, they sound pretty good.

Also, I can't help but notice that you've been here close to two months but only have four posts. Something that turns off a lot of new members from this site is that they make a few posts, they don't recieve much of a response, then simply never log in again. If you want more comments on your pieces, I'd suggest listening to other people's and then commenting on them. It doesn't always work but I always make it a point to comment on anyone's music that has commented on mine (assuming they've posted something here) and there are plenty of other people who hold themselves to the same standard.

Anyway, hope you stay around. You write interesting music and it's always nice having new members.

Hey! Welcome to YC!!
A nice piece. I enjoyed the contrast between the two ideas you had. I really enjoyed the 7-8 part. Its was so fun and the chords although one may call them
"standard" where just fun. Very good work, you can see there is some talent here.
A few questions however...
1 - at mes. 35 you have quar. rest - quar. note - quar. note - 8h note, i might just be crazy but arnt you missing half a beat? I use sibelius so I know they wouldnt let you do that. If you want it to be sort, a staccato will suffice. Don't just leave out half a beat.
2 - I wish you could describe what were thinking as you wrote this or better yet, what Smjörið er Brætt means! It might give some light to the piece.

Anyway, nice piece over all. Good luck with the performance. I just had my first performance and it was incredible! Congrats! Like Nirvana said, just go around, comment make some friends, we are very welcoming here!!

Congrats and good luck!

-Scott.

Nirvana69:
I agree, this work is not very original sounding, but it took me quite a while to come up with an idea decent enough to work into a full piece. Like I said, I've been 'suffering' from a lack of creativity, motivation, etc. for the past few months. I'm sure that, over time as my skills as a composer improve, I'll be able to write more original pieces, but for the time being I am pretty satisfied with the outcome.

I just wanted to break away from the old I IV V thing as far as chords go, though I did include very basic chord progressions in the 7/8 sections and in the 8-or-so measures near the beginning in which the violas get the melody and the violins are mostly silent. I did experiment with different scales and play around with different chord shapes and dissonance.

The samples are just the ones packaged with Sibelius. I did add a bit of reverb later on just to soften the sound, but I agree, the samples are not very pleasing to the ear. Maybe one of these days I'll purchase GPO or get an actual recording of the piece.

Also, I signed up nearly two months ago, and did post a couple of times, but I think I ended up forgetting about this website and rediscovering it in my bookmarks. You can expect me to be critiquing other peoples' works as well as posting music of my own in the future. :]

Tenor10:
Thank you very much for the input. Just to clarify, measure 35 is in 7/8 time, so q+q+q+e would make a total of 7 eighth note beats. So, no, there are no missing beats. And I'm pretty sure that Smjörið er Brætt roughly translates to "The Butter is Melted." The translation itself does not fit the piece at all, but I thought the shapes of the words fit well.


Well, I found both of your inputs to be very helpful, and they definitely push me in the right direction. Thank you all very much!

See I knew I had missed a time change! It makes so much more sense!!

Very tasty! Loved the "odd" tonality. Hope your violas are ready to KICK and aren't the shrinking violet types!

Well, we've got quite a few very strong violas in the orchestra--at least half of the section--so I feel confident in them.
Even so, this is nothing compared to Malcolm Arnold. They'll kick it with no problem at all. :]

Originally Posted by Nirvana69

Also, I can't help but notice that you've been here close to two months but only have four posts. Something that turns off a lot of new members from this site is that they make a few posts, they don't recieve much of a response, then simply never log in again. If you want more comments on your pieces, I'd suggest listening to other people's and then commenting on them. It doesn't always work but I always make it a point to comment on anyone's music that has commented on mine (assuming they've posted something here) and there are plenty of other people who hold themselves to the same standard.

Anyway, hope you stay around. You write interesting music and it's always nice having new members.

Elliot

First off, welcome to YC.

I quoted Tyler's (Nirvana69) post because he is absolutely right.

I also follow the same standard and by doing so have made a number of contacts/friends here.

If you ever listen to any of my music, you will see that I am a huge fan of dissonance. Just one word of caution I will offer and will do so in a short story.

I went to hear a 'world premier' of a piece not long ago and few people there were happy with the composer's music. What killed it for him was, his music was going along fine being very tonal. Then out of nowhere he added just a few dissonant notes into the mix. It didn't fit and blew the mood he had set.

What I am trying to say is be wary of just tossing in a couple of off notes in hopes of drawing interest.

I did not find that to be the case in this one. In fact I rather enjoyed it. Keep it up.

Ron

Thank you for your input, and I agree completely. Excessive or unnecessary atonality is usually disruptive of my enjoyment of any piece, unless the composer has planned it all perfectly and is able to create a beautiful color rather than a "wrong note". It's like the fine line that separates the good avant-garde from the bad.
Now, I am nowhere near being a master of harmonies, but the only instance of dissonance that I am somewhat nervous about is the C,F#,B chord in measure 12. I rather enjoy it, but it makes my mom cringe and makes other people kind of tilt their head with a quiet "hmm". I may change it later on if it doesn't work out at all, but I like to think of it as testing the audience. I'm just curious about what I can get away with and still keep my audience's interest. Just an idea.

Well, there's the old chestnut about no wrong notes, only wrong resolutions ... or words to that effect.

The 1st violins' B to Eb looks the most ... ummm ... courageous (?? – lol) thing at this point. If it's keeping you awake at night, you could try B-to-somewhere-else in conjunction with something-else-to-the-Eb, with adjustments to the viola part if necessary ... but I'd be tempted to take it to the first rehearsal as is.