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Everything posted by Rabbival507

  1. @PeteHarrison Look at this sorry monkey Let us know when you put it back online.
  2. I like the use of quote, feels appropriate to the situation. Yes, it gets atonal at some places. And yet- 1. Waltz is a pretty absurd way to describe riots. You might have meant it and yet I believe one would expect a more "broken" waltz. Miss some beats, make syncopations, insert a bar of 7 or 5 eights at random places. 2. It seems to... resolve. At many places. I don't think that it stands up to your idea. Yes, I saw that you suspended resolution at some places. and yet... it has lots of little cadences and one big finale like a classical piece. One way to avoid resolution would be using a whole tone scale (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVV0jkZC4jI&feature=youtu.be), maybe you should try that out. 3. The sudden fermatas and complete breaks kind of loosen the effect. I understand that it comes from a place of "let's surprise the listener with a sudden stop", but to me it feels more like you blow the wind out of the sails. Insert a different surprise there instead. Maybe a sudden pitch shift, maybe sudden chromatic slide. About the protest... all I can do is do what the world usually does- look from the side, give a note or two, then go back to my own problems. My state is going to monarchy as well. Hope that we won't have to get to this situation. Hope all is well for you and your family.
  3. Could be a pop song of some sort. Try and define what exactly you were trying to do, then ask yourself- should it really be as repetitive? Can I change something? The harmony? Maybe the rhythm? Should I develop my motive further? Should I add a counter motive? Maybe I should simply try and compose something new just to keep composing? My first piece was... awkwardly repetitive ... looked something like that: because I just thought like "isn't this rhythmic idea cool" and basically kept it exactly the same during the entire piece (I think it's about 3 minutes long). Of course, it could be used for something. a repetitive pattern can contribute a lot to a piece's texture (https://youtu.be/APIKVLw1tT0). Yet, you might want to give a further thought to your piece, try some new grounds. The worst thing that could happen really is that you'll hear how it sounds, would not think it's as good, and then try something else or go back to your familiar ground.
  4. Thanks @Madeline Newson, Do you, by any chance, happen to be a mountain climber?
  5. @Dark Energy "Expanding the universe... of music!"😃 Ok so. I'll do what I usually do and write notes while listening, so I won't forget anything, and you'll get a picture of my immediate reaction. The tiny bells (forgot their name) right at the beginning are, for me a little to sharp. At least for the beginning. If you want a nice effect to start with... Idk, Siren's voice is known to be gentle and soothing. Maybe a pp with soft stick on a gong? or a bell? Something lower and not as sharp? Also the horns are a little too... adventurous? epic? (That's just my opinion) to begin a song about sirens with. I think that you should have added them later for a greater dramatic effect. The texture that starts around 0:12 is great. Interesting. What voice vst did you use for this one? The cut at 1:24 was a little too sharp for me. But maybe I get your concept of Siren's wrong? Also the addition of electronic sound is good, gives it a somewhat unnatural feeling. Around 2:00 it already sounds like... well like an epic adventure song. Many musical cliche's (the use of horns, strings, drums, the overall rhythm, sudden major chords). 3:10 there she is again. So the whole epic section was a transition? What story did you have in mind? The harp adds a lot. I like the dark texture from 3:55 on. I'll give it another listen now, maybe I missed something. Ok, I think I get it now. It's like- *Part I: "These are Sirens" *Part II: "These are sailors" *Part III: "Hey, what is this beautiful voice I hear? I haven't heard a woman in months, let's go say hello!" *Part IV: "Hello there! Oh no! What the...?! (Death Screams)"
  6. @AdamKulju I'll write while listening. Notation-wise, I think that Pno's left hand should open in bass clef. I expected some richer chords over there (so far you're doing a great job both harmonically and rhythmically). Okay so it was a fun piece to listen to, no further notes.
  7. @celloman99 I saw that you were looking for a review exchange. None of my pieces is looking for a review now, but I thought I should give one of yours a listen. I can't promise a good review because I don't have much time. Let me give it a listen. Ok, so... It might actually sound like that when being performed. I don't think I ever heard a non chaotic performance of "In C", but that's, I think, simply because when you deal with aleatoric music you take the risk it won't be as well organized as a piece that was written to be performed in one specific way. Not to say that you shouldn't write aleatoric music, I actually wrote my first partly-aleatoric piece about two months ago. But you do should have in mind that... well that it probably won't be exactly what you had in mind. So that was my opinion about aleatoric music in your piece and the way it sounds. In general... The piece felt a little unorganized. Again, that might be the effect you wanted to create. And yet, for me, having a more than five minutes piece with no theme or repetitions... I don't know, for me it was hard to follow. What I think you should do, regarding that case, if you want flutes to carry the main melody, is ask them to repeat and variate certain sentences. Say this one: It's beautiful. Now ask them to play it in 3/4 or 6/8 or one octave lower etc. I hope this helps. You know what, I actually do want you to review a piece of mine. Just give it a listen and tell me your general opinion, of course I'd appreciate some helpful criticism but it's not done yet. I'll send it to you privately in a moment.
  8. Could be a good atmospheric mood. The scale looks like some sort of A Jazz (minor) pentatonic with added 2b? I guess? About ways to develop it... it depends on what you'd like it to become. It could basically stay on the same feeling, maybe with added light wind instrument (say Sax or Clt). You could simply use it once in a while, as a second voice or as a background sound. Generally static music such as this could be well used for a computer game. You could or maybe should replace the harp with a guitar, unless you like the harpy sound. I personally think that you should variate the basic rhythm once in a while or at least add another background sound, at some places it sounds a little boring, just this simple four quarters pattern. Also I think you might want to change the bass pattern once in a while.
  9. Well it keeps moving but it's not to high so it's not a bird to small. It's not any kind of duck because it feels stable, neither a peacock because there's no flesh of color. It's something stable and with beauty of some sort (not a crow then). Oh I know! This movement between two close notes... What do you think about flamingos?
  10. @sswave I don't think that the soundeffects should be a part of the music track. Separation would lead to a better feel of the scene, the white noise track should be controlled according to the player's situation. Other than that it sounds pretty fit to the story you told. You might want to bring the plucked strings (idk if that's a harp, a guitar or something else) an octave lower, to me it sounds too sharp. Also, if you already have the honor to compose for an actual game- look at Austin Wintory first works (I'm talking about aleatoric soundtracks that change according to the game's parameters), I think that's the best kind of soundtrack a game can have, you might want to consider doing that. Maybe do what Lena Raine did in Celeste and simply have a few tracks running at the same time with some of them faded out or cancelled when necessary.
  11. @edfgi234 You have many good ideas of rhythms and your harmony is interesting. However, piece is a bit too long for my opinion and there were some parts where it felt quite empty: It's a bit of a dramatic fall after our ear got used to more rhythmic patterns, more complex harmony and more voices. It feels to empty, at least for me. If you want this nothingness I guess it's fine but I think you should drop these elements one by one. I'd simply give the right hand chords too, so it sounds... fuller in a way. Also I like the way it ends.
  12. I'm not here much lately simply because I don't compose much and don't find much to say about other people's compositions. I think that since music isn't a part of my daily routine for... over half a year now my brain kind of put it aside. Currently it's good because I'm still on a massive learning program, where I can't even listen to complicated music (the radio is always on a pop channel since that's what the other people like...) I surely hope to get some more time to listen to music I like, make and review some more pieces but... sadly that's probably a false hope.... Anyway! So here's my last performance. The piano missed a quarter near the end but other than that I'm thankful for this brilliant performance. Some of you saw some this piece in some levels during it's development, like when I chose to use the In-Scale. I don't ask for any review really. I just have a need to upload it, so that people who saw me mentioning it in the past would be able to see the final result. Maybe I even already uploaded it and I don't remember though I doubt it XD I will come and check out on it (I'm not sure how often though), so I will eventually read your opinions. Thanks in advance for the listeners and reviewers :) Also here's the Jami Sieber's approval:
  13. Thank you so much for giving it a listen! Now that my work got way more demanding I visit the forum less often, it's really nice to come back home to see that someone actually gave a thoughtful listen to my piece and liked it. Yes, I guess the story is something like that. Thanks for giving it some thought :)
  14. 1 I know that there's some spicier harmony here and there, but it felt too static for me. Dynamics stays exactly the same, the range doesn't move much, you repeat the exact same passage three times(???) You could keep it that way, that's just my pure opinion. Also you should write it this way: Also, judging by the names, you either don't have a clear picture of what you want exactly in your head or you're trying to make progress by writing many pieces (which is why you count them). That's how it seems to me anyway. In both cases- give some more thought to each of your pieces. At the beginning I thought that making many pieces would help, but I actually achieve my progress by looking at things I've already written in a deeper way trying to understand what I can do better. (Of course not just by that, but it's more helpful to give a deeper thought to your pieces, I believe that big thought can reveal the answer to the biggest question of all. If you got the reference I'm proud of you.) 2 Please stop repeating yourself so many times. I mean, I guess it's fine depends on your musical background, it's just my personal opinion. I think that you need to learn how to connect to things together. Like Christophe Beck told me a few years ago: "Your pieces sound like many ideas hastily mixed together". Therefore, you should try and learn two very important musical subjects: Transition and Development. I can't even begin to cover any of them but I can recommend you to try and... Take the main idea of the first and the main idea of the second. Now put them 20 bars away from each other and fill the empty bars only using the two materials you already have without repeating any of them in the exact same way. You could do that by taking the rhythmic ideas and mixing them, trying to do some modulations (scale transitions), adding new voices, changing basses, doing whatever you want really... as long as it has a root in your original materials. I hope this was helpful. Have fun reading about these two things online and practicing them.
  15. I did take the time to listen to it, actually did so twice because I listened once again while writing my review. And look, I still asked him to take hours to recompose his piece- because I believe that he should take some time to make it better. Pieces have to be deconstructed in order to be reconstructed in a better way. I hope you'd understand. Also I don't believe in that: I won't have much time to review pieces in the next... I don't know, a few years. I believe that one could ask me to focus on a few places in his piece. It's a matter of the quality of the review, I could listen to a piece once but I won't understand it as well as if I had listened to it five times or more. I asked him nicely and look what happened at the end- I decided to give him from my time instead of working on my own works although I don't have much time for any of these things.
  16. @celloman99 Ok, I just set down and listened to the whole thing. Once. There were some beautiful parts in there, but, try to act surprised- I still think that it needs to get much shorter. Yes, I saw the Pateceramics was mad at me for asking that. But I'm being truly honest with you- it's really important, especially if you're going to present it to a live audience. Yes, I write long pieces too. It's not a bad thing. But if you want people to be able to follow your piece- you need to build it differently. If someone reads the scroll and the music plays in the background- why not. But for a standalone- it sounds like lots of ideas with nothing that ties them together. Choose a few good ones and build it with them, then it would be easier to follow and you'd be able to play with the audience's expectations. It would also help you to achieve climaxes. I mean, just listen to this: https://youtu.be/XN8gPvX48p4?t=222 at that point the audience are so familiar with what's about to come that a climax can be achieved, simply with that anticipation. (Miyazaki uses the same theme lots of times, but that's a sort of extreme example, I don't mean that you should do that too). Ok I already built a whole conversation in my head so I'll simply write it down. You:"Well look at what Stravinsky did in The Rite of Spring! that's a bunch of ideas thrown together and TWICE the length of my piece!" Me:"But Stravinsky made such drastic changes in rhythms, dynamics and harmonies for his time that he was able to keep the piece... more than interesting. Also the first reaction of the audience for his piece wasn't very charming to say the least." You:"Stravinsky came to mimic ancient Russian music in a story that's set in ancient Russia. My story is set in ancient Israel! If anything, it should be inspired by Jewish music, that's less ritual and wild." Me:"I've been listening to Jewish folk since I was born to due to the society I live in, and you're right, it isn't close to being as wild as Stravinsky's famous work. And yet, the songs are mostly short and keep the audience's attention using their words, not their repetitive melody." (Btw I have an idea to develop a Jewish folk, if you want we'll talk about it privately later) You:"But I didn't come to mimic the Jewish folk at all! I just wanted to musically tell the story as I know it from my town and my church." Me:"Well reading a bit about Jewish folk might help you make it more authentic but nevermind that. I personally don't remember this story exactly because I'm not a religious man. You shouldn't try and do what Stravinsky did. It's not a story of that kind. You shouldn't make it sound more like Jewish folk if that's not what you wish. Also I was about to suggest that you make it sound more like christian songs from the middle ages, parallel perfect fifths, three or four counterpoint voices like in Bach's works, etc. But You shouldn't force yourself to do any of these if that's not what you wish." You:"That's a lot of words for saying... not much. What do you suggest I so if I don't want to consider any of these?" Me:"I think that you should analyze the story in your own way, finding common themes. Then choose a musical idea that would represent each theme. That way, you'll have music that would be easier to follow, and would still tell the story, just in a different way. Also if you don't like one way it comes out, you can try and analyze it differently. That's the beauty of literature analysis- you can look at one piece of literature with a few different 'glasses'." So sit with your priest and analyze it together. Maybe, with the players too if they're religious people. (Also sit for a few hours with the piano player and look over piano pieces so you learn how to better write for piano) After that, choose your most favorite themes from your existing piece, or make entirely new ones if you wish. Choose what each musical idea represents in the story, and there you go- you'll have a piece that makes sense storytelling-wise (even in a more sophisticated way) and also is easier to follow for the audience. I hope you'll find my review helpful :)
  17. @celloman99 I'm sorry but it's way too long for me to review it well. Please make a shorter few minutes version that I'd be able to listen to a few times without loosing lots of time.
  18. @LoganScheffler Well... But no, I'm afraid that you can't upload a video not through a Youtube link.
  19. I can't imagine this as a part of a Ghibli movie. Also Howl's Moving Castle isn't really that old. My main problem is that it sounds too similar to your other works. Ok my tips can go in two ways, depends on what's more important for you- Wacky Wizard- How about a percussion ensemble? Xylophone, Glockenspiel, Vibrophone, Chimes... You could also try moving around in different scales, maybe put two "unrelated" chords one after the other (I mean chords from different scales), You could try adding more runs, trills, special rhythm changes and sudden jumps in the intensity. Old Movie Soundtrack- Well you should simply listen to old movie soundtracks. If your piece was a part of a soundtrack... then it would be one that was made in the last ten years probably. Repeating the same staccato strings pattern with these epic choirs and brass... what is this? A superhero movie? A few bassoon parts and some glockenspiel at the end didn't change the full picture much. About Gihbli in particular... there's a wonderful Sideways talk about it I already linked on this site several times. The whole way Hisaishi shapes his music is inspired by his culture. Go learn a bit about Japanese music.
  20. @HowieFletcher Ok I'll give it another listen now. Yes, Luis is right. You repeat yourself way too much. Changing the background won't answer the need for the change in the melody. Even a little change, not too much. He thinks about the same woman, but remember her in different memories. So Keep the general idea and play around with it, but do NOT repeat the (or almost the) exact same sentence over and over again. I mean, in certain kinds of music that's exactly what you have to do, but "emotional" music requires some development. I don't say that you have to get to an emotional climax, not at all. Think about it though, he remembers the same woman from different times (I think?)
  21. A short four hands piano piece, nothing new or better really. Just thought you might want to give it a listen and criticize it. Maybe I'll develop it further next time I come back home. Reasons as to why I composed this: 1. I was at a festival two days ago, where one of my best pieces was performed (I'll upload the performance as soon as I get a high quality version of it). In this festival I heard a beautiful piano piece made by another young composer and remembered that I haven't composed a solo piano piece in a long time. 1.5 At the same festival I met a four year academy music student who recommended composing something for one instrument. 2. I have a very small collection of four hands pieces (around five or six I think), and they're all at least year and a half old. 3. Someone told me that since I'm not home much I should write something short and simple. 4. I wanted to write a piece about a letter received from someone the character haven't spoken to in a long time.
  22. @HowieFletcher Can you please upload the score? You might consider that a musical disability for a composer, but I can't deeply review someone's piece just by listening to it. Reading the notes would help me understand what you did there. I believe that most of the reviewers here could say the same thing.
  23. There's the forum's wiki. Yes, I believe that one can learn and succeed in music school without a theoretical background. Or any background actually. I mean, it depends on your ability to use a newly gained knowledge, and your will to sit down and compose. I can tell you that I am not going to go to music school because that's my free field, where I like to do whatever I want whenever I want. Going to music school also means doing music tasks and homeworks. Of course, one could force himself to compose. It's mostly math after all. But then it's not that fun to do, and then what do you do when you want to create and express yourself on your free time. Composing becomes just another school subject. You need to force it on yourself. Now I'll listen to your piece. No wait before I do that- you should always upload a score if possible. You posted it under "Orchestral Pieces" so I assume it has a score. Reading a score while listening makes it much easier to understand the piece, Especially for people like me who don't have absolute hearing. Or whatever you call it in English. I mean, I could just say "wow that sounds nice" but that won't be very helpful. Cool opening. (Won't use it as an Overworld Theme though because then the player will have half a heart attack every time they go into the main land) It's good that you have this quiet part, that fits better in an overworld theme. But maybe you had a different type of game in mind than what I have in mind? 1:48 is wonderful to give the player's ears some rest. Overall it sounds great, but I think that in some parts it's too exciting for an overworld theme. You could use it for the opening screen though. Any thoughts?
  24. it won't be lost under the winds if the winds would play very quietly. Like, say, in the beginning of Venus The Bringer of Peace. I'm in contact with many string players, and basically from what they told me, when I need to think about the second violins I think of it that way- The fact they don't have the lead doesn't mean they can't handle their business. Yes, sometimes people are in the second violin section because they can't handle carrying the main voice. Therefore, you might not want to ask them to play things that are more difficult than the second violins. But most of the time, as long as you know that all of the players are well trained, it shouldn't bother you. Look at your thought about splitting them into two sections. Does the fact some of them play a single pizz note once in a while make them worse players? Not at all. Actually now I think that I got you wrong. Do you want to have an easier way to play it? Say give them one way to play it as intended and other one for those who can't? Well, that sounds like a great idea. I actually wrote this in one of my pieces: Also take that back: Viola players aren't worse than violin players. Actually the best string player I know is a violist.
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