Please review my composition! chance to meet Hans Zimmer and Lorne Balfe!

Hey all!

I was hoping I could post this here, and have you guys review my composition. I only ask that if you do enjoy my creation, that you please share it on social media, by sharing it from the video page here: Just allow yourself to listen - that is all--       http://indi.com/95ktp

Nice!

I like that you play many instruments and put them together in one track. The video is nice too!
The drama is real, but not too overwhelming, which is good.

The rhythm at the beginning disturbs me to be honest: the sixteenth notes accompanied by the low notes do not fall on the beat so there is no actual beat.
Furthermore, the music rather sounds like a sequence of loops than one whole. There are great ideas, but now you only state them and go to the next melody or concept.
Some chord progressions sound strange to me.

The synth 16ths that go up and down? or the strings 16ths?  Either case, the vst's I used, their samples aren't perfect.. so I was kind of stuck with what I got..  Do you think adding percussion or something in those areas would create more depth and rhythm? And you're right, they pretty much are sections of loops haha.. When I originally wrote it out it was more of a diary of ideas? And then I kind of just started blurring the lines with transitions.. but if you can tell then I guess I didn't do that well at hiding that.  But thanks for the critique! Much appreciated! 

2 hours ago, willguardproductions said:

The synth 16ths that go up and down? or the strings 16ths?  Either case, the vst's I used, their samples aren't perfect.. so I was kind of stuck with what I got..  Do you think adding percussion or something in those areas would create more depth and rhythm? And you're right, they pretty much are sections of loops haha.. When I originally wrote it out it was more of a diary of ideas? And then I kind of just started blurring the lines with transitions.. but if you can tell then I guess I didn't do that well at hiding that.  But thanks for the critique! Much appreciated! 

 

No problem!

I mean the passage at 0:09 which sounds like a synthesizer. I don't think that adding more layers will improve the rhythmic 'shakiness.' The best way to solve the problem is probably to use other loops. . . The loops are nice, but they need some transition moments to flow over in each other. Some transition sections could improve the density of the composition.