Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Opening: Repetition establishes. That's a great rule to follow, so well done. But think of it as an audience member. How many repetitions do they really need before you move on?
Chorus 1: A bit of the same critique goes here too. We know the motive you open with and it's cool you start the vocals that way too, but we don't really need it to be catch-all, especially in the beginning. Your rhythms in the faster passages are also not super even.
Verse 1:  Movement to the tonic near the end of the first part was a good choice.
Verse 2: Much better! This would also be a good place to change up the track a little bit, either with reharmonization or parallel motives.
Outro: It's cool to have it end where it opened.

I didn't get a real good sense of the arc to this one. Dramatically it kind of stays at a baseline at then fluctuates just barely from there. It's supposed to be overheating, right?? I wanna hear that!

Nice work, I just think it's a bit conservatively written.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The initial (and main) motif is made of big leaps, I think it contributes to make the repetition a bit difficult to catch. Some contrast to that would make it more balanced.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...