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Here is my first large theme and variations work for piano. I don't think the score is perfect, but I will make these changes later.

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What a pity that the dynamics are so unbalanced! I know it's the software...

The whole piece is very interesting, there is variety enough. The initial theme is very ornamentated, perhaps a more straight exposition of it... But it's fine. An issue I always worry about is the "excess" of octaves... I'm not very fond ot them, in general.

 

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I'm going to specifically talk about Variation 7 if you don't mind.
Have you heard Pictures at an Exhibition? Not the Ravel orchestration; I mean the solo piano version. The reasons I think the last movement of that piece is ineffective is the same reason I'm not as huge a fan of this movement in yours.
I'm going to start of saying I really, really enjoy the melody transformation in this variation. I think it's beautiful. The accompaniment, however, leaves a bit to be desired. A lot of this comes from the left hand. Because of how you write is as sustained through one or two very slow measures at octave doubling makes me feel like you have this intended as an orchestra piece in a way, as low strings. It would work better there because the envelope of the sound doesn't decay as fast. The piano is great because it can weave around melodies, especially in the beginning of the section. Most of the time it's also on the root chord, which it really doesn't have to be. First inversion chords do wonders in implying a sense of movement. 
When we get to the loud part, all of these issues become a lot more pronounced. Intended to be grandiose, I don't really get that feeling because the ear, while never losing sense of the tonic, loses sense of the specific forms of the functional harmony. The range between the two hands also makes it feel like there's a gap of sound that's missing when listening to it. This becomes especially apparent in measures like 163 with the one moving note being a high suspension without contrapuntal backup.
It's a beautiful section and more while stasis and decay can play an important musical factor, how it doesn't change in style between the two periods forces a cognitive dissonance between styles that implores investment, but clashes with the familiar.

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Thank you @Luis Hernández and @Monarcheon.

12 hours ago, Luis Hernández said:

The whole piece is very interesting, there is variety enough. The initial theme is very ornamentated, perhaps a more straight exposition of it... But it's fine. An issue I always worry about is the "excess" of octaves... I'm not very fond ot them, in general

Should I change some of these octaves?

11 hours ago, Monarcheon said:

The piano is great because it can weave around melodies, especially in the beginning of the section. Most of the time it's also on the root chord, which it really doesn't have to be. First inversion chords do wonders in implying a sense of movement. 
When we get to the loud part, all of these issues become a lot more pronounced. Intended to be grandiose, I don't really get that feeling because the ear, while never losing sense of the tonic, loses sense of the specific forms of the functional harmony. The range between the two hands also makes it feel like there's a gap of sound that's missing when listening to it. This becomes especially apparent in measures like 163 with the one moving note being a high suspension without contrapuntal backup.

Do you suggest I arpeggiate the accompaniment, similar to the next variation, or move the left hand higher. I now understand perfectly the problem with this.

Thank you again. 

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Hi, I don't mean you have to change anything. As I mentioned before in other post, many many octaves make them less effective, because you'll have less contrast. On the other hand, an excess of octaves gives me the impression the composer doesn't know what to do with the inner voices.

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9 hours ago, aMusicComposer said:

Do you suggest I arpeggiate the accompaniment, similar to the next variation, or move the left hand higher. I now understand perfectly the problem with this.

Whatever it takes to get it to move a little more. Loose counterpoint, light arpeggiation. Some composers opt for moving on beats where the melody doesn't. In the bigger section, filling in the middle could be used instead of forcing motion where you don't want it. It's all about balance.

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