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Hi eternum,

You have some interesting harmonies going on here, but I would urge you to experiment a bit more with the left hand.  For what it is, it's not bad, but you could do so much more with it, it's quite rhythmically static at the moment.

Also, you don't really develop your melodies to their full extent.  Try playing it backwards, upside down, keeping the rhythm but changing to notes, keeping the notes but changing the rhythm, there's lots you can do to broaden melodic elements into a better, fuller piece.  I listened to your waltz also, and it suffered from the same lack of development.  That's not to say your ideas are bad, they're not, only that each time you start a new round of the first or second themes, they remain much the same as the first round.

I would take both of these pieces and see how many different ways I could change the themes, and vary also the left hand parts.  The left hand should never really be "just" an accompaniment, it should also have a life of it's own if possible.  These are some of the things that make music more interesting, and in that process, you will also learn a lot about what is and what is not possible.

I hope you don't mind my comments, it's just my opinion, but if you do try some of my suggestions, I'm sure you would have fun, and produce some really interesting music.

Good luck

Mark

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Hi Mark,

First of all, thanks for your interesting in my piece.

I accurately read your suggestions, and I'm fine with them. I agree to your opinion about my lack of development in the melody and in the staticity of the left hand, and I'll try to consider them in the future, even if it can be not so easy. However I noticed you are an advanced composer, I also listened to one of your creations, and I really appreciate your experienced writing.

Thanks again for your review of my piece. 

Good luck also to you!

Roberto

 

Edited by eternum1968

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Hi Roberto,

It's just practice, patience and perseverance.  You're doing really well so just experiment and see what happens.

I personally take quite a while to write a piece, a month at least or even two until I'm really happy with it.  The piano sonata "Lily" which you commented on, took me two months from start to finish.  The ideas come quite quickly at times, but then you have to put meat on the bones and edit and alter and tidy up etc., these things don't happen over night.  Take your time, and above all, enjoy what you do.

Mark

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