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I haven't written much for quite a while but was messing around on the piano and decided to work on a simple idea and add a jazzy variation. Probably could use some polishing. Comments and critiques always appreciated.

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You managed to do two things that I've been trying to do well for a long LONG while and still don't manage to do so!

(these are: writing a complete piece in a major scale &&(and) adding chords that don't belong to the scale in a way that doesn't sound out of place)

However, some points that require your thought:

 

1. image.png.98c1e93fb4b01d825d58feef7e013145.png 

These would sound muddy. Remember- the smaller the interval the more muddy it sounds on a lower register.

I'd advise you not to play a third below bass clef's middle C. I mean, these could be used to achieve a specific sound, I just don't think that they fit well in this piece.

1.5 image.png.6e65c4860b9567b5483256d7055fbfa8.png 

The way you spread the voices is... unusual. Normally there are fewer notes (in bigger intervals, look at 1) on the bass clef and a chord (or a more voices with a possibility for closer intervals) on the treble clef.

2. image.png.11e5b5123cadc7e780772c6156aff225.png

These might be hard to perform together. I'd make the lower one two triplet-eights then one. That's an important point because it recourse all over the piece.

 

In general- I think that these two (and a half?) point could be fixed if you'll simply try to play the piece (unless you don't want it to be performed).

I admit that I don't try to play most of my piano pieces, but when I do I find out many "bugs" that would take a much longer time to find without a performance.

I hope this was helpful, and that you have fun performing your piece if you try to do so.

 

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