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Malfacila Familano


alfredo094

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Wow, Alfredo, such passion! In terms of the harmonic structure and layout of the piece, it sounded late Classical/early Romantic. The chords were clean, for the most part, making this sound cool and fresh. You also weren't afraid of exploring in related keys, such as Gb major/Eb minor and Ab major/F minor. Good for you! I think you have some depth to your music that only comes from experience.

Some criticism—the piano part isn't terribly fun to play as it conists mainly of maj/min triads and arpeggios. The middle passage, where you venture briefly into 3/8 time, seems exciting, though. There are also a number of passages that double notes in both hands (e.g., M. 20) that will need to be cleaned up. My ear was also longing for some "off color" chords to spice things up every now and then, but I didn't hear any except maybe the measure before the end. As you become more familiar with the circle of 5ths and constructing music from it, I encourage you to explore altering the chords bit by bit. What might happen if I made this an augmented 4th instead of a perfect 4th? What if I made this a dim7 instead of a min7? And so forth. (BTW, I did hear an aug. 4th early on in the piece and got excited, but it never happened again—or I missed it if it did.)

Keep up the great work!

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  • 4 weeks later...

There are a few spots I find a little strange; interesting in concept but might need more voice leading to really make them shine, like the Bb minor chord in second inversion in m. 16. It's cool because it's a reharominizing of the bass note with a different function, but the tenor voice's motion makes its arrival sound more awkward than it needs to because of a necessary magnitude and direction change from the otherwise semitonal motion. Tonskald also makes generally good points.

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