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Putting this here so I can view the score alongside the audio (I'm using FLAT online notation -on a chromebook.... which sucks). 

Feel free to give your feedback. This is the first orchestral size work I've composed in quite (and I do mean quite) some time. So, if you have tips on the orchestration, please feel free!

Some notes about the composition itself:

The piece uses the following twelve tone row: C# E A F D A# G# D# G C F# B

The chief motivic material opens on bar 9 in the strings. I may add an additional motivic unit -or devote development to a segment of the theme. Not sure at this point. 

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The idea of it is pretty cool. I like how the beginning comes back near the end of the exposition, but it seems a little heavy handed at the beginning in order to achieve that effect. What might be cool moving forward is preserving hexachordal combinatoriality with the start of that figure horizontally and vertically, since you seem to already want to do that in places like mm. 21-23. Finding a way to invert that combinatorial figure vertically would give you a lot more early-position row forming down the line that all sounds similar.

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13 minutes ago, Monarcheon said:

The idea of it is pretty cool. I like how the beginning comes back near the end of the exposition, but it seems a little heavy handed at the beginning in order to achieve that effect. What might be cool moving forward is preserving hexachordal combinatoriality with the start of that figure horizontally and vertically, since you seem to already want to do that in places like mm. 21-23. Finding a way to invert that combinatorial figure vertically would give you a lot more early-position row forming down the line that all sounds similar.

 

I may expand the opening and use that material in more depth (as well as expand it to be more naturally unfolding).

Good point on the hexachord combinatoriality. The bassoon/cello line that leads into the piano restating the main theme is an area where I look at exploring this in the development. 

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Wow, it's difficult to follow the score, split in two pages.

I've listened to this 4 times. I like atonal music, and all its derivative systems. It's challenging to build a coherent work with this language.

I think the introductory part is good, but it's not connected to what comes next. I don't know if you have the idea of linking it in some way. It's nice you establish an anchor with the three note motive (ascending and descending). Atonality needs this alternative methods to be coherent and not arbitrary. The entrance of the piano is quite good, I like its part. 

I assume the midi sounds are not the best. but it's enough to get the idea. One issue I would try to work more is dynamics. Those very long crescendos (endless hairpins) make not much sense.

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22 minutes ago, Luis Hernández said:

Wow, it's difficult to follow the score, split in two pages.

I've listened to this 4 times. I like atonal music, and all its derivative systems. It's challenging to build a coherent work with this language.

I think the introductory part is good, but it's not connected to what comes next. I don't know if you have the idea of linking it in some way. It's nice you establish an anchor with the three note motive (ascending and descending). Atonality needs this alternative methods to be coherent and not arbitrary. The entrance of the piano is quite good, I like its part. 

I assume the midi sounds are not the best. but it's enough to get the idea. One issue I would try to work more is dynamics. Those very long crescendos (endless hairpins) make not much sense.

 

Dont get me started on the score. Never... ever... ever... use Flat! Lesson learned here.

I am planning on anchoring the introductory material. It does seem disjunct from the rest of the exposition. I've got a few ideas for this. 

The piano entrance is an homage to Mozart (my favorite composer). His concerti used the same method several times. 

The hairpin crescendos were added as I didn't know how to add cresc or dim using flat. My score sketches dont have the hairpins, so I had to make do to input it onto the notation software.

I'm glad you like this so far! 😄

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Of course, it's a draft. But good and promising.

Besides, your work encourages me to write using this languages, which I love... But being so unpopular,  I haven't lately worked on them very much.

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Just now, Luis Hernández said:

Of course, it's a draft. But good and promising.

Besides, your work encourages me to write using this languages, which I love... But being so unpopular,  I haven't lately worked on them very much.

 

Glad I can be an influence! 

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5 hours ago, Luis Hernández said:

I think the introductory part is good, but it's not connected to what comes next.

I disagree, I think it works nicely. If performed, I think the listener will percieve the first idea as an intro, and will then see it as a first section of the piece, once it reapears in the end. This creates ambiguity, which is always great.

 

14 hours ago, Monarcheon said:

but it seems a little heavy handed at the beginning in order to achieve that effect.

I agree with this. Perhaps you could orchestrate it a little bit lighter, so that you have some headroom to expand in the last section.

 

I really like the sonority you achieved in this. I want to see where it goes.

Kind regards, Jean.

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