Hendrik Meniere Posted April 22, 2020 Share Posted April 22, 2020 I hope you all are doing well this days! Here I share a little scherzo of a little symphony I'm writing to practice. The scherzo is based in some fragmented themes my little sister was tackling on the piano (that is why she is mentioned in the score!) I hpe you enjoy it and as always I'm open for feedback and things to improve. I know that the structure of the scherzo it is not completly correct as in the scherzo part I do not repeat the A section and then the B section. Aswell istead of a trio there is some sort of funeral music (to give some contrast). MP3 Play / pause JavaScript is required. 0:00 0:00 volume > next menu Scherzo (2) > next PDF Scherzo and Trauermarsch 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guillem82 Posted April 24, 2020 Share Posted April 24, 2020 Bon exercici Hendrik! Una pregunta: perqué no Hi ha dues seccions de violin? Resulta una mica extrany. I això fa que hi hagi molta distancia entre violins/violas i violas/cellos. El meu concell es comenzar amb un esquema típic d'escriptura per corda amb dues seccions de violins i potser doblant cellos i contrabaixos a la octava i intentar que les veus es mogin sense fer grans salts i mantenint un equilibri entre les parts. Al compasos 79-81, per exemple hi massa distancia entre violas i cellos, crec que no està equilibrat. M'agrada el moviment entre violins i Baix, però amb Violins II quedaría més equilibrat. Aquí 2 solucions possibles afegint violin II i duplicant el Baix a la octava. en el 2on exemple he duplicat les violas perqué el Do ha the resoltre de forma descendent i el F# ascendentment. Llavors si volem que l'acord seguent sigui complert (SOL-SI-RE) una opció es duplicar el RE de l'acord anterior. Qualsevol dubte que tinguis em pots escriure aquí o per privat. Salut! Good exercise Hendrik! just one question. Why isn't violin II? That's a bit odd and that's why you have to mach distance Distancia massa gran entre violas y cellos/big gap between inner parts. I suggest you start with a typical arrangement with violin I and II and duplication cellos and DB to the octave and try not to do big leap on the parts until you get a fluid voice leading to keep the balance. Bars 79-81 you have a Hugh gap between violas and celli. I don't think thats good balanced. I like the movement between DB and violin though. Here 2 possible solutions adding violin II and duplicating Celli/DB to the octave. in the second exemple I duplicated the violas, because C has to resolve downwards and F# has to do upwards, so if you want a complete chord (G-B-D) one solution is doubling D in the previous bar on a viola divisi. Any comment you have, I'm happy to help you. Possibles solucions/possible solutions Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monarcheon Posted April 27, 2020 Share Posted April 27, 2020 In your main melody (i.e. mm. 31-32), this tripling of the seventh is awkward, because it can't sound like a IV in this style because V - IV is problematic. Lots of dead space with no momentum between held notes, and some string parts just seem to randomly fall off the map. Opening the strings' melody on a I6/4 chord is really ballsy and I don't know if it works the best in this style. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arthurbrown Posted May 1, 2020 Share Posted May 1, 2020 This is an extremely charming piece. The first theme is simplistic (not a bad thing) and straight forward. I hear a lot of early classical influence. Some early classical- some early Haydn or Leopold Mozart. I liked the transition to minor for the second theme. It created some nice contrast. I do think that it would have been nice not to have the repeated noted in the bassoons during the minor section, because we get the repeated notes in the major section. The only other critique is the fact that in the minor section, you used D#'s. It's more accurate to use Eb's when in G minor because it's a primarily flat key. Overall, this is very enjoyable piece and you have real talent. Keep up the great work! 😄 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojar Voglar Posted May 4, 2020 Share Posted May 4, 2020 If you are in an early stage of your development as an orchestral composer, it is not bad at all. But you should avoid so much repetition of similar chords. At least you can divide basses and other strings into various patterns, even though it can still be the same G major chord. The formal approach is completely adequate though. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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