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Cruel Seduction


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A waltz I composed several years ago, which was originally a piano piece until I reworked it for string orchestra earlier this year.

I'm trying to evoke a specific mood with this one – something beautiful but dangerous, elegant and alluring yet simultaneously threatening.

As always, any feedback is welcome!

 

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I would love to hear more.  I love your voice. Here are my suggestions, both musically and typesetting.  when you have a good piece, it promotes more critiques because music is being made.

 

1) After "divisi", unless your teacher told you else wise, use "tutti" instead of "unison"

2.) Last measure, that would be better suited for a soloist instead of a section.

3) When branching off as a soloist, the soloist gets their own bracket for clarity in the score.

4.) Strings don't like divisi in 3s.  If you do the aforementioned, you'll have the numbers to do it with the 1st's Plus, you don't have  (as in the ending) the basses playing on the last push.  Give the basses C3, the cellos a double stop on C3-G3, and build so-forth.

5.) To avoid sonic monotony, consider adding the melody at times in the Basses. It will give the music more breath!

6.) 143, you MIGHT want to consider swapping the violas and the cellos there .

7) Meas. 111, no need for the divisi; give the violas the Gb3

😎 same as 133-115, give the divisi to the violins.

8.) Meas. 64, put that in the violas.  Celli won't have enough time to get to arco. If you put it in the violas, that measure is just enough time for the cellos to prepare the down-bow.

9.) Meas. 69-72, no need for divisi.

 

10.) The opening might as well be violas and violins.  that combo would give the melody a little more push

 

My 0.02.

 

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11 hours ago, maestrowick said:

After "divisi", unless your teacher told you else wise, use "tutti" instead of "unison"

Wow, this is what I had learnt:  unison is used to indicate the end of any divisi, whereas 'tutti' is used to indicate the end of any solo or small ensemble passage and where the full complement of players (or singers) is to chime back in.

Edited by Luis Hernández
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@maestrowick thanks so much for your detailed feedback! I'm glad you liked the piece 😊

On 11/21/2020 at 8:56 AM, Luis Hernández said:

Wow, this is what I had learnt:  unison is used to indicate the end of any divisi, whereas 'tutti' is used to indicate the end of any solo or small ensemble passage and where the full complement of players (or singers) is to chime back in.

I'd heard the same thing – perhaps the UK and US have different conventions?

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