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Action piece


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Hello.

Here is a short action piece I composed.

It would mean a lot if I could get feedback on it.

If I could get feedback on how well the orchestration is balanced or how well the piece develops but anything you notice will be helpful.

Thank you very much. 

Edited by Bjarke
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Hi @Bjarke,

I'm not good at orchestration at all but I think the orchestration is balanced. The use of colour is great and I particulatly like b. 23 though I don't know whether the glockenspiel can hit that quick. Probably a celesta will be easier I guess.

For me I do think the usage of cor anglais and clarinet in Eb unnecessary since they are featured with their distinctive timbre at all particuarly the clarinet in Eb. Just doubling the clarinet in Bb and oboe will be great I guess.

Also for me this is a one off piece in a minite, so that thematic development issue is not very important; all I hear is the initial theme repeated twice and then goes to ending.

Thanks for sharing!

Henry

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Wow - action? It's action all right!

Without studying the score in detail, the balance seemed fine. I couldn't see any immediate technical issue with the instrumentation.  I'm cautious about giving the double basses an independent part because they can muddy the harmony easily at a realistic mf to ff dynamic but as they're playing detaché throughout it adds to the percussive effect of the lower strings.

As Henry says, the piece stands by itself but would probably be better as a movement in a suite or symphonic work. As for development it's hardly long enough to develop anything - but it contains material that could be developed into a longer work. However, it would need something contrasting - not slower, keeping up the same pulse but perhaps legato in the melody part.

A good example of a scherzo that in someway matches your piece (while sounding nothing like it) is the scherzo of Shostakovich's 10th symphony (listen to the Karajan reading that goes at a helluva crack! if you're of a mind)).

It's an excellent effort. 

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It definitely reminds me of a classic Hollywood film score. Good energy throughout and good color in the orchestration.

A couple of notes with the orchestration. 

I agree with Henry about the glockenspiel in m.23. The speed and placement of those notes would be very difficult to play. Either a celesta or piano would be more practical.

Also, starting in m.26 through m.36 you give no rests for the piccolo, flutes and oboes. That’s a lot of notes to play without being able to catch a breath. Wind players can use circular breathing, but the amount of individual notes played within that time might be a little hard.
It’s very easy to forget that people need to breathe. I do it myself when orchestrating, and have to make a mental note to put in rests

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1 minute ago, Tom Dahlenburg said:

This action piece wasn't bad, it reminded me of an old western movie or maybe even "the good the bad and the ugly". 

I just finished 30 minutes of Action suites myself if you want to have a listen, it's a difficult genre of composition it really is. I'll attach it below 

 

https://www.youngcomposers.com/t44456/30-minutes-of-action-music/#comment-1186720701

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Measure 23 at your tempo (Oboe) I don't know if it's playable as written.  One would have to put in slurs on the first 2 notes of the sixteenth runs.  Besides the tempos - it is an exciting work - great for the old time movie serials of the 1930's.

Mark

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