Honest Feedback Requested: Lithl - Swarm of Sound (Polytempo & Polyrhythm)

Subject: Honest Feedback Requested: Lithl - Swarm of Sound (Polytempo & Polyrhythm)

I would like to hear your honest thoughts on my piece, "Swarm of Sound," without any flattery or sugar-coating.

I don't mind harsh criticism at all; in fact, I would find it very helpful.

This was submitted to the Sonuscore Competition. (While the music was not originally composed for this contest, the video was created specifically for it, so it differs from the actual original concept.) It was rejected, and I want to know exactly why it failed, where it fell short, and whether it even functions as "music" at all. Please provide your feedback without any compromise .

=The Concept=

Idea: The piece was built around the imagery of a massive swarm of percussion with strings.While the result bears a slight resemblance to Ligeti's Requiem: II. Kyrie. Molto espressivo, it was created primarily out of curiosity—specifically to see what would happen when stacking polyrhythms in polytempo based on my initial imagery. 

=Compositional Elements=

A. Polyrhythm: Based on the concept of using 12 notes in the strings, I chose a 3:4:7 ratio (resulting in 12 notes per cycle).

B. Polytempo: The above polyrhythms will be performed in polytempo.I determined the tempo based on a manually drawn graph. There are 12 sections; each new tempo is added as the previous cycle ends. The tempos are based on integer ratios rather than simple multiples, progressively getting faster.

C. 12-Tone Strings: To evoke the "swarm" image, I used all 12 tones. Strings are triggered simultaneously with the polyrhythmic/polytempo timings and held until the next note is played. Furthermore, the strings are layered in octaves. This ensures all 12 tones are constantly sounding to heighten the sense of chaos. The strings are played with tremolo.

D. Aleatoric Selection (Dice): To remove personal bias from the note selection, I attempted a randomized system based on simple rules (inspired by John Cage). Specifically, as shown in the video, I created a table using dice to select the notes. This makes it more chaotic and hopefully creates a kind of swarm of sound.

=Final Note=

I submitted this because the timing coincided with a contest held by Sonuscore, a major strings library developer, but consequently, It was rejected. While the other entries were undoubtedly wonderful, I am left wondering if this rejection proves that I lack talent or that I am merely producing self-indulgent noise that provides no value to the listener. If that is the case, I intend to change my approach immediately upon receiving feedback.

Please be blunt. I am not looking for comfort; I am looking for a harsh, honest critique. I would truly appreciate your rigorous feedback. (Private feedback is also highly appreciated.)

Thank you and sorry for taking up your time.

Edited 1 hour ago1 hr by Lithl