My second piano piece ever! (Unfinished)

HanselandGretel_unfin2.pdf

Hello gooberro and welcome to YC! I am honestly surprised that no one has given you feedback yet and this is your second piece, as it has a surprisingly high level of quality with interesting progressions and good themes. I appreciate your work very much.

Thank you! I don’t know if there’s a reply button, but this works. I just really tried to capture the kids playfulness with the evil stepmother, and the fog of the forest. For the directions I tried to use detailed ones to enhance the depth of the piece. 😁

Hello gooberro!
This piece feels like it's portraying mysterious characters.
It's a nice work, and each section feels like a different character or a different scene being depicted.
Personally, I like how it ends.

You mentioned it's unfinished, but which part specifically?
As a small piece of advice, I feel like when you post a piece, if you include a bit of the background story or specify what kind of feedback you're looking for, people tend to react to it more.
Not everyone is like that, but I think that's generally how it goes.
Though I'm not really one to talk.

Best,

Lithl.

8 hours ago, Lithl said:

Hello gooberro!
This piece feels like it's portraying mysterious characters.
It's a nice work, and each section feels like a different character or a different scene being depicted.
Personally, I like how it ends.

You mentioned it's unfinished, but which part specifically?
As a small piece of advice, I feel like when you post a piece, if you include a bit of the background story or specify what kind of feedback you're looking for, people tend to react to it more.
Not everyone is like that, but I think that's generally how it goes.
Though I'm not really one to talk.

Best,

Lithl

Hi, Lithl

Thanks for the feedback. I am still getting used to both the forum and Musescore so that’s why the storyline wasn’t explicitly there.

So far, I have the:

Children playing - first part

Evil stepmother - second part

Banished to the forest - third part

Finding the house - fourth part

After the huge B chord, at “p subito”, the right hand being eventually joined by the left hand is them seeing the witch.

Parts I need to finish:

The witch actually trapping them

Children fight back

The witch gets cooked (literally) and the children escape

Finale

I’m working on them! Plus, only one school week to go until summer break!!

I see, and thank you for explaining the meaning of each part.
Once you finish those parts, feel free to share them!
I hope it turns out to be a great piece for you.

Best,

Lithl.

Great job!!

I really enjoyed your contrast - one thing I would maybe consider is adjusting some of the evil stepmother section. That register of the piano can be very muddy if not approached correctly. I think adding some pedal markings would help ensure a cleaner performance.

I also appreciate how you transitioned between sections. They're not abrupt and are very smooth.

I don't really have any critiques - thank you for sharing and happy composing!!

20 minutes ago, BlackkBeethoven said:

Great job!!

I really enjoyed your contrast - one thing I would maybe consider is adjusting some of the evil stepmother section. That register of the piano can be very muddy if not approached correctly. I think adding some pedal markings would help ensure a cleaner performance.

I also appreciate how you transitioned between sections. They're not abrupt and are very smooth.

I don't really have any critiques - thank you for sharing and happy composing!!

Thank you! I will keep this in mind, I am used to a digital so I have little experience with these things!

gooberro

Hello!

As other people have mentioned, this is pretty darned good for a second composition ever. Not finished, but plenty of material to work with and plenty of places to go I think....

I read the title of the piece (Hansel and Gretel), I listen and close my eyes and I can imagine Hansel and Gretel. So, I mean, mission accomplished! I played along a bit on the keyboard and there are some nice chord changes that capture the mood changes. It all seems fairly smooth. Transitions seem pretty good to me. There is enough variation to keep things interested.

It really tells a story...I'd be interested in hearing/seeing more!!!