Sonnata In A minor

This is the first movement of my Sonnata In A minor for Solo Piano.

Allegro Apassionato

Your rhythms, to me, seem really off kilter. The first theme, you'd probably be better off if you just changed the rhythm of it all and made it simpler, because the listener ends up tapping their foot with the pianist's left hand anyway. There are other various rhythm issues that you probably don't want to hear about, too. There was one part that sounded like a version of chopsticks. I suggest staying away from block chords (primarily in the LH) and try varying the rhythm of it all. One can only take blocked chords for so much time before it gets boring.

The left hand is a melody.. if you try to follow it.

Thanks for your comments.

My very first observation immediately upon seeing your score was the poor notation. Honestly, your score is a jumbled mess and would never be considered for playing or performance.

As far as the actual music, I found the piece to be incredibly repetitious. The parallel octaves do not seem to serve a purpose and become redundant quickly. Your harmonic progressions are 200 years old and thus your piece lacks individuality.

Poor notation?

Jumbled mess?

Incredibly repetitous?

Redundant?

200 year old Progressions?

Lacks Individuality?

And I thought these would be only the good points?

Can you add anything negative?

Thanks....

The score is incredibly messy. The way any listener would hear it would be with a 2 triplet anacrusis, having it notated as you do now is needlessly complicated. Some of your melodies are quite nice, but, there isn't a great deal of cohesiveness (is that a word?) it seems to be one unrelated idea after the next. I did quite enjoy your use of secondary dominants, and I have nothing against your use of "200 year old progressions".

Mark :thumbsup:

One unrelated Idea after the other?

Very interesting.

Thanks for your comments.

the melody you put for the left hand is not really clear. i thought right hand was the melody when i first heard it. you should make it more clearer that shows that your left hand is the melody instead of the right hand.

In sonata form, you have to repeat the exposition. i didn't see any repeats until the end and i thought it was going back to the exposition but it ended o.O. I later found out that that's the recapulation.

Well... um. That just sounds like a jumbled mess of chords. Oh wait! It IS a jumbled mess of chords. Whew. You should try cleaning up your score a bit, revising the piece once or twice, then repost.

Ok .. I have decided to name this Sonnata.

The Messy Sonnata In A minor

Dont mess with it...:P

Sonata has one N to my knowledge :huh:

hey saulsmusic. um how old are you? (nothing offending or anything -0- i always get uncomfortable whenever i ask someone this)

I'm gonna give my take on this piece from three perspectives

1. From a listener's point of view I thought it was nice, even a little charming in an antiquated way but only in the beginning. After the theme/introduction thingy it sounded empty and messy. The attempted syncopated rhythms felt forced and the left hand started to irritate me so I lost interest altogether. None of my expectations were met and the surprises weren't pleasant or did not invite much thought.

2. From a pianist's point of view, it's a poor score to read. The triplet notation would probably be better set as compound time notation. Opening melody was okay but felt like an archaic dance form which would not be in triplets. The excessive blocked chords in the LH, excessive octaves in the RH, the general underuse of most of my fingers, odd mid measure rhythm change (specifically at 36), the horribly uninteresting section from 36-57, the static section from 81-93 and the half-phrase transition to the recapitulation at 94-95 would all serve to either irk me or put me to sleep depending on the time of day.

3. From a composer's point of view, the basic melody of the intro/theme is full of material for a much better expansion. I feel like some parts are possibly attempts to be Mendelssohnian or Schumanish but fail to be so and at the same time fail to be original. Two things to remember: KISS (keep it simple, stupid) and fill in your octaves. Also, block chord texture can only go so far. You said the left hand was melodic. Whatever melody is there gets lost, find a way to bring it out more.

Hey Talib.. that actually wasn't a bad critic.

Thanks for the comments...

o wow. i love how you tell people if their comments are good or not.

I'm going to give you comments, even though you don't seem to really want real ones anyway.

The reason that people are confused by your score is because the first two notes sound like an anacrusis. Now, that could be a really cool effect, but by the time things get off kilter in m.19, you've already lulled the listener into believing what the downbeat is that it come off as a really nasty surprise. Also, it's a hard thing for a player to keep up with. Yes, after practice it will become second nature, but the point of writing music is not to trick the player. What you want to be done here could easily be done with a meter change, and then it wouldn't be so confusing.

Octaves on a piano really make an interesting color, but if you use it all the time, the piece kind of becomes bland. Take a look at some of the most revered piano pieces and you will see that octaves are really used for a sort of effect rather than the norm.

I do think there could be much more interesting ways to execute your harmonies. Just because it may be chords, having an interesting background as well as foreground adds a new dimension to your piece. Right now, everything seems to be just sticking in strict block chords under a melody. Perhaps think of ways that you could make just this portion of the composition interesting in itself.

Well, there. You've heard pretty much the exact same thing from 7 people. Now it's up to you to decide if you're going to acknowledge that your piece may need a bit more work in these areas. You'll definitely have a working composition if you decide that we all don't know what we're talking about, but we want to help you realize this piece into the best that it could be. You really have to use your better judgment. If this many people have said that something is rather odd, then sit down and really think about it. Perhaps you need to get away from it for a few days, perhaps a year. The point is, you seem to dispell any negative comment with retorts that really don't make much sense. If you really want to get better at composition, then you will take all criticism that you get in earnest and truly consider it.

Yes.. I will work on the piece , try to make it better.

Thanks for everyone's comments..

The left hand is a melody.. if you try to follow it.

Thanks for your comments.

What is there to follow, the left hand was primarily a drone throughout the majority of the piece.