First piece in about a year

Since I haven't written anything in about a year I decided I better do something before I completely forget everything.

Any comments and suggestions would be appreciated. An mp3 of a midi rendition can be found at

Jon Slaughter - Prosaic's No.1 - 12-09-2007.mp3

Since its midi there are no ornaments and personally I'd rather have the performer add there own. Also much of the dynamics is not played properly or omitted by the midi performer.

Thanks

Jon Slaughter - Prosaic's No.1 - 12-09-2007.pdf

Well written certainly. I think the main critcism I have of it is that it seems to lack a satisfying structure, or any kind of dramatic arc. It's lots of intricate little ideas (all very well thought out and very listenable) one after the other. I don't see why, for example, it ended where it did rather than 8 or 16 bars earlier, or indeed 8 or 16 bars later. Normally you can feel whereabouts you are within a piece of music and you can sense a dramatic form to it, even if it's not programmatic. With this I had some difficulty doing that.

I hope you understand what I'm getting at. Technically, you're a good composer, you can tell that straight away but this piece is not quite there as a whole, for me at least.

Saying that, if it's intended as part of a suite or larger work as the title implies, the lack of a "dramatic arc" may not matter so much.

That's just my 2p worth anyway...

A very good work! The music itself is delightful, I like the ideas, in fact they're interesting, pleasant, sometimes even a bit classical...but I agree with Robert, the piece needs more logic in it's structure, and some improving...I also think, that it would be possible to reduce it a little, it can be very helpfull.

Could you guys give me some of your reasoning why it doesn't song logical? I didn't follow any specific form but I did have in mind a very strange ternary form. Sorta A-B-A but with the 2nd and 3rd being very short.

Is there a specific point where the piece starts to sound illogical or is it the whole piece or what? (Hard for me to write in some strict form and hard for me to see the piece from a different perspective as it starts to sound logical after listening to it 50+ times when composing it)

Thanks,

Jon

For me it had an aristocratic beauty about it.

Your ideas flowed very freely and they were all nice.

I enjoyed it. It was pleasant like a sunny day and my ears were tickled. :)

It is a good piece, but I do somewhat agree with previous commenters.

My biggest concern was the abrupt jump from one scheme to another in bars 65-66 and then back again in bars 86-91.

When that part begins there is no apparent segway and in a short piece such as this it destroyes the balance a bit.

The way out is also a bit rocky, especially the fermata and rhytmic change for the length of two bars kind of throws you off balance.

Then the ending is (in my opinion) far too abrupt. By only adding two bars (in a totally classic and overused manner) to the end you'd give a better feeling of finish, and in a piece this conventional (in a good way) it wouldn't really feel cheesy.

But as many things all this above is totally subjective.

Now, I must say that I really like bars 14-19 (and then of course 43-48), for I am a sucker of pretty melodies and fluffy bassline, most likely because I compose them myself.

Overall this is a very well composed piece and, as somebody said, has a distinct classical feel to it. Dynamics in the right places and seamless modulations (is that the English word?).

One question out of curiosity: Is it a personal choice to always change key signature, or is it some fashion that I have yet to adopt myself? Do you feel it easier for you to compose that way or is it done with the performer in mind?

Well, those are suppose to be the "different parts"(the stuff you say is abrupt). I was having trouble finding room and because they are short and there is some modulation's its was hard make it smooth(for me at least) without lengthening it more(which I suppose I should have done). It goes from C to C#m/Dbm and is an abrupt modulation. I sorta wanted it that way but sorta didn't but I guess after listening to it many times my ears got used too it. I also was kinda in a hurry to finish it and really everything from bar 30 onward was done in a hurry.

I actually started out trying to make a scherzo but as usual I can never stay on track and usually get bored towards the end and just try and add stuff to make it longer ;/

I use the key signature changes just for reference when I am modulating so I don't put in any wrong accidentals or have to deal with them as much. Its used much more in contemporary music but I have seen it in a few of Beethoven's works. I imagine that it could be quite confusing for a performer though if they are not used to it.

Thanks for the comments,

Jon

I must admit that I returned here today to listen again.

Nice work. :D

Lol. Thanks. I suppose its not all that bad ;)