April 18, 201015 yr Welcome to YC, Nick! You've written a very cool track. Here were my thoughts. Nice harmonies around 0:45. Really lush. There's a clarinet (maybe oboe) melody going on from 0:40-1:00. Bring it out more. 1:00 to the end doesn't really have a melody to follow. I think if you just emphasized some of the notes you've already written and made small phrases out of those, the piece would sound a bit more focused. The ending kinda cut off. Was that you're intention? Nice instrument sounds! What libraries/programs did you use to compose this? Join in the fun on this site and leave comments on other people's works. The more you reply to other people's posts, the more attention your own works will get. Looking forward to hearing more from you, -John
April 20, 201015 yr Author Thank you for all your input, John! I completely forgot to mention in the description that this song cuts off so suddenly because it's supposed to be a loop for a video game/DVD menu. All the patches used in this song came off my Fantom's SRX06 Complete Orchestra expansion. I think if you just emphasized some of the notes you've already written and made small phrases out of those, the piece would sound a bit more focused. What exactly do you mean by this?
April 20, 201015 yr I'll be general and then I'll be more specific. In general, he want to be able to follow a melody from 1:00-1:30. The melody doesn't have to be a big theme or anything, it just has to be brought out from the material you've already written. Now in specific. From 1:05-1:21, you have a woodwind line playing the melody. Unfortunately, its getting buried right now by the surrounding harmonies. Bring this woodwind line out from underneath that. After 1:21, the most interesting melodically seems to be those low brass playing those two half note phrases. Can you somehow connect the downbeat of 1:22 in the low brass and strings to the low brass' half note phrases? The simplest way to do this would be to crescendo that downbeat on 1:22 into low brass' half note phrases. How does that sound? -John
