Rushed Memories

Cheesy name, i know. Made this in a couple hours, it started as an improv on the piano. Any comments are welcome.

:o It's a .mus file! :o Oh dear, you're not a Finale user, are you? Haha, sorry, but I don't have anything that can read that, lol. If you upload a .pdf or (better yet, but less likely,) a Sibelius file, then I'll be able to read it and make better comments/suggestions. Still, it sounds nice! I'm a big Bb minor and Maj7 chord fan. I'd love to hear it on a real piano! :)

Oh, and I don't mind the title.

:o It's a .mus file! :o Oh dear, you're not a Finale user, are you? Haha, sorry, but I don't have anything that can read that, lol. If you upload a .pdf or (better yet, but less likely,) a Sibelius file, then I'll be able to read it and make better comments/suggestions. Still, it sounds nice! I'm a big Bb minor and Maj7 chord fan. I'd love to hear it on a real piano! :)

Oh, and I don't mind the title.

Not really sure how to save to a pdf in finale 07, its not under any normal options. Theres also about no chance that i'll play it on piano, seeing as i can't play piano.

edit : nvm, fixed it. .pdf is up there now.

Alright, i'm gonna bump this since i just edited it a whole bunch and i still havent really gotten any feedback.

Cool!

Alrighty, let me see, a few things....

First of all, i like your tone cluster at measure 14. 'Twas nice.

Second, you may wanna go through and adjust your voice leading. I don't know if all of those parallel fifths (mm. 13-14, etc.) were on purpose or what, but cleaning them up could make the sound a little less rustic. Of course in contemporary music it doesn't really matter. Like I said before, you could've done all those on purpose. But if you didn't, you could try changing the chord voicings around to correct for them, and see if you like the sound. (You could save it as a second version or something in case you don't like the sound.)

I also think you could improve motivic usage in the song. Let there be one musical theme that ties everything together. You already have this going a little bit at the beginning. Mm. 2 and 18 are identical. If you could repeat this pattern again closer to the end, it could help solidify that theme in the listener's mind. It doesn't have to be the stuff from mm. 2/18 though. Anything that makes you feel the words "Rushed Memories" -- whether it's a rhythm, melody, chord progression, or whatever-- should be what you use as the motive or theme of the piece. That way, the feeling that you want your song to evoke will be brought out better.

Another thing--around the end, like measure 32 onward, you have the right hand playing a few sixteenth-notes and then holding that chord for three beats. It might be cool, to have the left hand do something else during those 3 beats to make it more interesting. In stead of just block chords, you could have it play sixteenth-notes also, ones that still lie within the chord. Or you could have it play the same thing as the right hand, except offset by two beats and down an octave. You could have like a whole call and response thing going on during that section. That's just a suggestion, but whatever yo choose to do, it would be nice to see some more action in the left hand. How are you at reading bass clef? If you suck at it (and I used to.), then practice reading it every day, and it will eventually become second nature. You said you couldn't play the piano. That's not so bad, but the piano can be an extremely useful tool for composition, ear training, sight reading, and music reading. Even if you can't play Debussy Preludes and Bach Toccatas (none of which I can do!), I still recommend being able to find your way around the keyboard, so you can play some of your own songs (even if it's just bits and pieces at half tempo). The music will end up sounding more organic than if you were just to compose straight into finale. Especially if it's a piece written for piano. Now, for all I know, you can already find your way around a keyboard, and you can read bass clef like a pro cellist. If this is the case, don't take what i said before as an insult or anything. I meant it as just an off-hand piece of advice, in case you did need it. And composing in front of a piano/keyboard is just what works for me. You may have a better method that works for you. I guess you could say it just helps me visualize the notes and chords and movement better. Also, it usually sounds better than a crappy MIDI. Which brings me to my next point.

Your sound quality sucks, lol. That's ok though. If the piece was written with the intent that it may actually be performed, then you're good. I have never personally done anything to spice up my own MIDI tracks. I still have all my default MIDI samples. The reason for this is that I don't wanna lean too heavily on the playback, and I wanna visualize my song in my head as if it were being played by real instruments/voices. Having a crappy playback, makes it easier to switch it for a real instrument in my brain. On the other hand, crappy playback can make you doubt yourself, too which is also bad. Say you wrote a beautiful passage of music, but then when you play it back, the crappy track makes it sound horrible. So you change it. And you end up with something that is not as good, not as original, and not as confident, and confidence, along with reflection and introspection, is the composer's best friend. So basically, if you wanna get better MIDI tracks, go ahead, but don't get anything too expensive unless you're gonna seriously get into electronic music or film music or game music or something like that. Like i said before, I personally don't use anything special. I hate the playback, but i always remember to listen in my head with real instruments.

Another thing I noticed was that in mm. 17 and 27, you need fermatas on the both staves, so it would be one on those whole notes at measure 17, and one on that last eighth note at measure 27.

You could also do with a better sense of finality. It sort of just ends. I don't know what your background in theory is, but if you don't know what a cadence is, check it out (i recommend Ricci Adams's musictheory.net). If you do know what a cadence is, then it seemed as if you just sort of plopped one there. Give what comes before the cadence, a bit more direction, so that it leads to the end of the phrase. Maybe you could do some more stuff with your motive here, as i was saying before. or maybe you could go back and repeat an earlier section. Whatever you do, i feel like i either need to know that the end is coming, or it has to be even more abrupt. I recommend the former for this piece. Even though the memories are rushed, that doesn't mean the song should be. the tempo could be fast, and the phrases short, but overall, i could see this song going on for a good two more minutes or more. you already have a passage that's very loud and fast. it might be interesting to have one that's soft and fast. Again, just a suggestion.

Well, that's about everything. I cant believe I wrote that much! Bear in mind those were only the criticisms. The song's really solid as it is. The only things I would definitely fix are the frematae (just cuz that's based on accepted engraving rules.) Everything else is just a lot of suggestions--most of them strong suggestions, but suggestions nonetheless.

Hope you found this useful. If you wanna take a look at my songs go ahead. I only have one posted right now, lol, and it's incomplete, but if you like it, let me know, cuz I'm just as open to feedback as you are.

Once again, hope this helped.

--Miggy

Btw, if you read my last post on the actual thread instead of on your profile, you can see it with all the paragraph breaks intact.

Less intimidating, lol.

Nice! thanks man, i'm still trying to figure out the cadences thing. i really appreciate the criticism. i'll edit this post in a bit with a couple edits on the song, per your guidelines.

Nice! thanks man, i'm still trying to figure out the cadences thing. i really appreciate the criticism. i'll edit this post in a bit with a couple edits on the song, per your guidelines.

Cool! I look forward to hearing it! As for cadences, a cadence it basically a two chord progression at the end of a phrase. For example, an authentic cadence is V-I. Which is basically Sol-Do. And in C major, it would be a G Major chord followed by a C major chord. As, i said before, I recommend checking out Musictheory.net. They have a whole bunch of free flash-based lessons and aural training exercises. I'll link you to the "Phrases and Cadences" one here. Hope it clears things up for you.

Another lesson there that might be of some help is the Circular Progressions one . If the roman numerals confuse you, then take a look at all the lessons from "Introduction to Chords" to "Analysis #1." I remember when I first encountered Roman Numerals in music, I was like, "Uhhhh, what?" Hahaha, but after you let it sink in, it all becomes pretty easy.

Hope to see the next version soon!

--Miggy

Cool! I look forward to hearing it! As for cadences, a cadence it basically a two chord progression at the end of a phrase. For example, an authentic cadence is V-I. Which is basically Sol-Do. And in C major, it would be a G Major chord followed by a C major chord. As, i said before, I recommend checking out Musictheory.net. They have a whole bunch of free flash-based lessons and aural training exercises. I'll link you to the "Phrases and Cadences" one here. Hope it clears things up for you.

Another lesson there that might be of some help is the Circular Progressions one . If the roman numerals confuse you, then take a look at all the lessons from "Introduction to Chords" to "Analysis #1." I remember when I first encountered Roman Numerals in music, I was like, "Uhhhh, what?" Hahaha, but after you let it sink in, it all becomes pretty easy.

Hope to see the next version soon!

--Miggy

Goddamn, thats complicated. i'll have to run through basically all the lessons that arent "THIS IS A HALF NOTE"

Goddamn, thats complicated. i'll have to run through basically all the lessons that arent "THIS IS A HALF NOTE"

Haha, yeah, well. They're all pretty short. And it's good to get this sort of "theoretical foundation" for your music. Once you know the rules, then you can start bending and even breaking them to better develop your own style. In a few months, you'll probably look back at some of your older Finale files and be like, "Woah, I can't believe I wrote that!" or "I would've totally done it this way!" Or something like that, lol.

If there's anything that you don't totally get from those tutorials, feel free to hit me up with questions! :)

Just finished a pretty major overhaul on the piece. From this point, i'd say that the piece is now almost finished. Still, any criticism is nice.