Anybody Wanna Trade Off Fugue Expositions?

Fugue-nerds,

What I propose is akin to a show-me-yours show-you-mine game wherein one person writes a fugue exposition, is critiqued by the other who then retaliates with their own exposition. This can go back and forth forever or just until we get bored.

I'm not looking to get into an intellectual arm-wrestling match. I just enjoy the puzzley element of fugue writing and like to learn.

Any takers?

sure, here's an exposition (+ a bit more; this is all i have now) that i'm not 100% satisfied with. the exposition comes from a fugue i wrote at university & got low marks on; the episode & rest of the stuff is new

May I ask what exactly the teacher's objection was to the exposition of your fugue above?

Nice idea for a thread.

And I like to see the rather Bach-ish approach Jay took with his fugue.

Some observations: there is a lot of parallel motion, for example in 6ths Eb (and G) to Ab (and C) in ms 2, and in 3rds in ms 3, etc... this is no problem, but some contrary movement would have resulted in better counterpoint. Still, I am fascinated with ms 2. After the parallel 6ths, I hear the Ab-C as in Ab. Even so strong that psychologically, I think the tenor Ab in ms 3 is repeated, which is not the case, but my ear has filled that harmony in. That same section in Ab, is asking to be reinterpreted in another key (in ms 2 it would be Fm to Cm) which happens in the 3rd entry (modulated to Bbm to Fm.)

One final remark. I notice how all 4 entries have a very strong tendency to Ab

I could have read on, but as the entries go, I stop it here.

As for how to proceed, are you going to write a fugue exposition on this theme? Do you want us to do so? Can I hand in a fugue for analysis (see here or here)

I'll explain a little more.

When I was in university, I took a fugue class and it was AMAAAAZING. Probably one of the best classes I've ever taken. I learned multitudes by just writing a fugue exposition and having it critiqued every week. I was hoping to duplicate the process here albeit with the internet hivemind.

I'd hope this thread would NOT be a place where you feel like you have to stand for your fugue and defend it from criticism but just accept it and move on to the next one. 

Perhaps I should have started us off?

Here's a wonky one I penned a few seconds ago:
 

 
Regarding .fseventsd's fugue.....
 
...are you sure that in measure two you want a d flat in the alto voice and not a d natural? Same comment for the bass entry later on.
 
Jncramer: Could the reason you're hearing all the entries in A flat be because he hasn't naturalized his d flat?

...and I'll keep the flash on my camera OFF next time. :)

 the exposition comes from a fugue i wrote at university & got low marks on

I certainly don't envy you for having that assignment. That subject is a real stinker. It's kinda ripping off B maj book I or Eb maj book I. Maybe there's a good cs using rests, but I don't really fancy finding one.

bjfugue.mid