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iii - V - I at the end of the first period really threw me off, since it sounded like a modulatory passage. Maybe that's just me. 

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Hi Matthew.  It would be nice to hear at least one repeat of the material before you end the song which is what you might have had in mind here since it ends on a pick-up note.  That would also naturally extend the length of this and you could write a second ending that would finish it off nicely.

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