A History of Light

I read this poem today and it almost made me cry at the first reading. So the first time in years I wrote a piece of music. Please let me know what you like and what you don't before I send this to my colleagues. All listens are greatly appreciated. Also below is the poem of the piece.

Through the telescope:

Crater of the moon

The rings around Saturn

A light floating in

Radio waves of the first explosion

As I stepped back, an image

Quick constellation of a figure

I knew

Traced itself for a moment

Among the night sky fires

I remembered the search

For a lost girl, years before

In the forests of upstate New York:

How we looked down thin paths

Ended by walls of mist

Lacing itself in layers between

The trees

How we were thanked and sent

Away: only the locals would keep looking

Now I had found her

But could never bring her back:

The angle of sight lost

Light-years between her fingertips:

I had found her

But can never bring her back

Edited September 24, 20223 yr by Some Guy That writes Music

I love the use of suspension and added seconds in this piece. For me it really represents light which is not too bright. The overall atmosphere is somewhat hopeful but repenting. I like it very much. That's not what I can do now.

In "how we looked down thin path", the top three vocies imitate each other in unison. Is the imitation used to convey a sense of chasing, and does the unison represents "thin"? That's a great use of word painting. But would it be better to involve male voices, since there is "we"?

In "how we thanked and sent away", female and male voices first sing in unison, then split in contrary motion. Does that mean the lovers are seperated despite being together for some time? That's only my guess.

Edited September 24, 20223 yr by Henry Ng

25 minutes ago, Henry Ng said:

I love the use of suspension and added seconds in this piece. For me it really represents light which is not too bright. The overall atmosphere is somewhat hopeful but repenting. I like it very much. That's not what I can do now.

In "how we looked down thin path", the top three vocies imitate each other in unison. Is the imitation used to convey a sense of chasing, and does the unison represents "thin"? That's a great use of word painting. But would it be better to involve male voices, since there is "we"?

In "how we thanked and sent away", female and male voices first sing in unison, then split in contrary motion. Does that mean the lovers are seperated despite being together for some time? That's only my guess.

 

Thank you! 

This poem is about a man who looks at the night sky and sees a constellation of stars that reminds him of a time looking for a little girl in the woods. He never found her, however looking up at the stars he sees her. Although this means she's dead, it also means her innocence will forever be in the stars.

The "how we looked down thin paths" is meant to represent looking through the woods and barely being able to see anything. The dissonance is meant to create discomfort at the hopelessness of finding this girl. That is why it is only SSA, because when the men join even an octave down the dissonances won't be as strong.

The "how we were thanked and sent away" talks about how eventually they had to give up. It hurts to stop looking but it needs to happen. That's why this separation happens.