Pas de deux scene from ballet

I’ve been writing a ballet for the past year (just for fun) and this is the pas de deux (love scene) for the two leading characters.

Hey there

I like this piece a lot, especially your orchestral coloring and chord choices. Very interesting harmony to my ears! For some reason this sounded like it would fit right into a fantasy RPG, but maybe that's because I'm knee deep in one 😄

As always, I'd love to see a score, but that's not really important. Was is important however is your phrasing, and it's the one thing I think this could be greatly benefitted from. I really like all the melodies and harmonies, even the long snare drum rolls built up a lot of suspense leading to the big tutti section. But there just wasn't any phrasing. All you need to do to my ears is add some strategic rests and instantly it's twice as good. 

It'd be like, if I read a great part in a novel, maybe say 30 pages, but it was formatted in a wall-of-text style. The content is great, but it's a bit overbearing to read with no paragraphs and sentences, just a long stream of words. 

Great piece man, are you going to post other parts of the ballet? Thanks for sharing

I can see this music representing an unrequited and dry love perhaps.  Cinamatically, or incidentally, the music seems to be very good at depicting some kind of new development that is happening where it isn't yet clear how it will affect the outcome of the story.  At 5:44 you have a great breakthrough of emotion that I think is more passionate and appropriate for a love scene.  This piece lacks the bittersweetness I'd expect of the innocence of true love though.  Overall an enjoyable piece of music however, even if a bit on the tame side.

On 11/25/2022 at 8:55 PM, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

I can see this music representing an unrequited and dry love perhaps.  Cinamatically, or incidentally, the music seems to be very good at depicting some kind of new development that is happening where it isn't yet clear how it will affect the outcome of the story.  At 5:44 you have a great breakthrough of emotion that I think is more passionate and appropriate for a love scene.  This piece lacks the bittersweetness I'd expect of the innocence of true love though.  Overall an enjoyable piece of music however, even if a bit on the tame side.

 

Thanks for the feedback.

The story for the ballet is based on an old Norwegian folktale. It has similarities to Beauty and the Beast. Girl is stuck in a castle with a beastly man.
This scene starts with her sense of loneliness in the castle, then apprehension on both sides, before moving toward feelings of affection between the two (at the 5:44 mark you mentioned).

On 11/25/2022 at 2:04 PM, Thatguy v2.0 said:

Hey there

I like this piece a lot, especially your orchestral coloring and chord choices. Very interesting harmony to my ears! For some reason this sounded like it would fit right into a fantasy RPG, but maybe that's because I'm knee deep in one 😄

As always, I'd love to see a score, but that's not really important. Was is important however is your phrasing, and it's the one thing I think this could be greatly benefitted from. I really like all the melodies and harmonies, even the long snare drum rolls built up a lot of suspense leading to the big tutti section. But there just wasn't any phrasing. All you need to do to my ears is add some strategic rests and instantly it's twice as good. 

It'd be like, if I read a great part in a novel, maybe say 30 pages, but it was formatted in a wall-of-text style. The content is great, but it's a bit overbearing to read with no paragraphs and sentences, just a long stream of words. 

Great piece man, are you going to post other parts of the ballet? Thanks for sharing

 

Thanks for the feedback.

My thoughts tend to flow pretty seamlessly, so I tend to have issues with putting in breaks. It’s something I continually try to remind myself of, but often fail to do.

I have a few scenes written so far, but not fully happy with where they are at. I might post another scene soon, as I’m feeling pretty good about it.

I hate scoring works… I write using Logic Pro.  I have to be in the right mood to actually sit down and score out what I’ve written, but hopefully I get around to it soon.