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How Did I do?

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I struggle with notating rhythm - here's my attempt at notating a hymn.

IT's All In You.png

It's basically ok!

The "it's" in b.2 should be a low G. "All my" in b.5 is a dotted one instead of even crotchets. The "my" in b.6 and the "in" in b.7 is a D, instead of an F. "As I'm" in b.9 is A for both notes. In b.11 there should be lyrics 'Lord I know you' with notes A,G,G,F. And there should be more bars I guess?

Henry

  • Author
20 minutes ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

It's basically ok!

The "it's" in b.2 should be a low G. "All my" in b.5 is a dotted one instead of even crotchets. The "my" in b.6 and the "in" in b.7 is a D, instead of an F. "As I'm" in b.9 is A for both notes. In b.11 there should be lyrics 'Lord I know you' with notes A,G,G,F. And there should be more bars I guess?

Henry

 

Thanks for the feedback, I actually decided to simplify that spot a little and take out those words when notating it. Are there any other issues with my rhythm? 

Edited by GospelPiano12

  • Author

If anyone has any harmony suggestions please let me know 

@Guillem82 I always enjoy hearing your thoughts

1 hour ago, GospelPiano12 said:

Thanks for the feedback, I actually decided to simplify that spot a little and take out those words when notating it. Are there any other issues with my rhythm? 

Actually I think it's correct, since It's really difficult to mark the rhythm for this one with some improvisatory singing!

  • Author

It is, very difficult

  • Author

Another one, I'd like to make my chord progression a little more interesting. This one is supposed to have a somber feel on the verses, but a bigger more "orchestral/grand" sound on the chorus. 

If anyone has any ideas on what could replace the Gm7 in both verse and chorus let me know. I'm also hearing a Bb-Dm-Dbdim7-C7 at the end of the chorus instead of a Bb-Gm-Gdim7/Db-C7

Actually why do you want to replace the Gm7 chord? I don't find it bad here. If you don't want the seventh you can always replace it with a G or D. 

  • Author

I just feel like there could be a better, more interesting chord there. Maybe something with a Db in the bass and I could have a F (6/4) chord afterward? What about the rest of my progression?

Edited by GospelPiano12

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