The Quiet World

Hello guys, I am back after another long hiatus. This time I am bringing you a light hearted choral piece about love. I came across a poem by Jeffery McDaniel which describes a world where people are only allotted 167 words per day, and so the character must choose to save them for his love.

Let me know what you think about the slightly sparser more recitative like beginning, as well as the polyphony at the end, whether or not it is effective.

I'm no expert on vocal music, but just near the beginning I've already found some questionable setting of the lyrics "Restaurant" in bar 5 .  Restaurant has 3 syllables but you've set it as if it had two.  Preferrably the word could be set with a cretic metical foot (long, short, long).  The concept of the piece is kind of interesting though, and explains why the whole latter part of the piece is just the words "I love you" repeated over and over LoL.  Musically and harmonically there are definitely some interesting moments that keep the listener engaged.  Thanks for sharing!

19 hours ago, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

I'm no expert on vocal music, but just near the beginning I've already found some questionable setting of the lyrics "Restaurant" in bar 5 .  Restaurant has 3 syllables but you've set it as if it had two.  Preferrably the word could be set with a cretic metical foot (long, short, long).  The concept of the piece is kind of interesting though, and explains why the whole latter part of the piece is just the words "I love you" repeated over and over LoL.  Musically and harmonically there are definitely some interesting moments that keep the listener engaged.  Thanks for sharing!

 

We must pronounce restaurant differently. I've always pronounced it "rest-raunt", as long, long. I never realized there were Americans who pronounced all three syllables, I thought that was a british thing.

Anyways, I find that I quite often break the rule you're talking about. Because even though the word is pronounced as [stressed, unstressed] I find myself wanting to extend it. I imagine it as a trailing off at the end of the phrase, with an assumed softening (rest-raunt) that I find natural in the way I might sing these lines, with less forward motion, specifically with no intent to move forward, but rather hold to a pitch. 

I'm curious as to whether after this explanation you still disagree with me. Because this has become something I have accustomed to doing, hearing another perspective would be quite helpful. I've also edited the score a bit, mostly minor harmonic stuff, singability things. 

5 hours ago, Some Guy That writes Music said:

I'm curious as to whether after this explanation you still disagree with me. Because this has become something I have accustomed to doing, hearing another perspective would be quite helpful.

Well - admittedly I am a non-native English speaker but a quick google search yielded this result:

Take that as you will - I think it is possible to pronounce the word with two syllables instead of three but I don't know how many of the performers/audience will cringe at the two syllable version or find it objectionable.

Peter