Waltz No.1 in A Minor for Piano

Hello everyone!

I composed a waltz for piano during the weekend. I wanted it to be "easy" to play so I composed it with an accompaniment that does not need jumps or the use of the pedal.
It is still hard to play for me, so, while I practice, I leave it here with my initial live performance until I can play it better (it would sound awful with midi). 
My main concerns is always with the form, as I am not sure how do transition best between sections, when to repeat things or let them go, etc. So any feedback about that is more than welcome. 

The piece is in the form ABCBA. 
A is the main theme in A minor, which is repeated at the end. It is a frantic and agitated theme (and needs to be played rubato).  
B is a modulatory section and needs to be played without rubato and with the melody "singing". It is based on a long chromatic descending bass line so it is highly chromatic and there might be many compositional mistakes in this section. While it is the easiest section, I have troubles played it beautifully. You can listen to the only time I played it as well as I wanted in 2:01 from the audio.
C is a simple lyrical theme in A major.

The audio is really bad, it is based on different recordings so the quality of the sound changes a little.
When I practice everything and have a finalized score and audio rendition I will update it!

Hope you like it and any feedback is more than welcome! Thank you!

Hi there.

Let's go to the point right away.

Firstly, Nice waltz! I really enjoyed listening. There seems to be a problem too, by the start. It is definitely not Presto. The Bpm is more like 112 (I use a metronome). Presto is kind of like 180 Bpm. If you want a Presto, I would recommend writing something like the following: Presto (c. 112).

Secondly, I could definetely hear Chopin here! The ideas at bar 18 and 38 is also very good.

Thirdly, cantabile part seems nice. The immediate transition to G Major and back to A minor is extremely nice. Although in a Major Key beginning, it still keeps a melancholic atmosphere. The bars 49-56 area's texture is favorable. Bar 62 is played wrong. You forgot to play the (appogiatura) B natural.

Fourthly, From Vivace, there is a Key signature change, which I like. Again the tempo is played wrong. Bar 93 does not make sense

Lastly, from maestoso, I really like the texture. Bar 116 is one of my favourite bars in this composition! Then, it is go to the start up to the Coda mark. The coda is not long enough, though. Could be longer.

In conclusion, You have great composition ideas, but you still need more practice. Overall, I would rate this piece of music a 8.5 out of 10. 

Have a nice day!

-TristanTheTristan

As Tristan mentioned, the tempo is slower than presto.   When Chopin wrote his, he rarely used a tempo marking.  The engraver added them later; or it was up to performer. So my suggestion would be is: have a pianist play through and then ask for feedback from them. Ask him or her, what tempo should you mark and other feedback. 

I notice the notation error. You are using a hemolia: a doted quarter followed by three 8ths grouped together. do not that. It makes it appear you are in 6/8 and not in 3/4.  

Hey @JorgeDavid!  Long time no see!

I think this is a very quaint little waltz that you've performed yourself!  I don't think you're having as many troubles performing it as you make us think saying that you "need more practice"!  LoL  My favorite parts of this are the unexpected cross relations between the melody and bass like in bars 4 and 20.  In bar 4 you have a G natural in the melody contradicted by a G# in the bass while in bar 20 you have a D in the melody with a D# in the bass - great idea!  Usually these kinds of cross relations would be heard as mistakes in A minor but you used them deliberately and made them sound intended and I really enjoyed them!  Great job and thanks for sharing!

P.S.:  I think even if you were using a notation program to realize a rendition of this instead of performing it yourself - in Musescore, for example, I would liberally use rit.'s and accel.'s to make the tempo sound more rubato and humanized.

20 hours ago, TristanTheTristan said:

Hi there.

Let's go to the point right away.

Firstly, Nice waltz! I really enjoyed listening. There seems to be a problem too, by the start. It is definitely not Presto. The Bpm is more like 112 (I use a metronome). Presto is kind of like 180 Bpm. If you want a Presto, I would recommend writing something like the following: Presto (c. 112).

Thank you so much for the feedback and I am glad you liked it, @TristanTheTristan, I really appreciate it!

Regarding the tempo, I am curious about what is the convention with Waltzes. As far as I know, I am using the metronome at around 180bpm if I consider each quartet note as the beat (so three beats per measure). Or is it maybe common in Waltzes to consider the bpm as the first beat of each measure or to consider other particular measure (such as feel of the music)? 

20 hours ago, TristanTheTristan said:

Thirdly, cantabile part seems nice. The immediate transition to G Major and back to A minor is extremely nice. Although in a Major Key beginning, it still keeps a melancholic atmosphere. The bars 49-56 area's texture is favorable. Bar 62 is played wrong. You forgot to play the (appogiatura) B natural.

Fourthly, From Vivace, there is a Key signature change, which I like. Again the tempo is played wrong. Bar 93 does not make sense.

Thanks for all the feedback of the parts you liked the most! And yes, there is a few notes that are different because I am constantly changing a few notes here and there and I will record it when it is completed. But 99% of the piece is going to stay as it is.

Regarding the bar 93, I understand it is a weird bar. It is just a repetition of the same material already played (first in Amaj, now in Dmaj), so the bass note should be A, to have a diatonic F#min chord with the third on the bass moving diatonically. However, in that particular context I like much more the A# in the bass, I am not sure why. It does create a F#7 chord with the natural A on top. The fact that the bass moves from A# to G is strange, but I do like it. But I can imagine most performers would actually change the A# into an A thinking it is a mistake 😅 I am aware of that bar and might consider changing the bass note to the A. But for now I like it better this way. Thanks for noticing it! 

20 hours ago, TristanTheTristan said:

Lastly, from maestoso, I really like the texture. Bar 116 is one of my favourite bars in this composition! Then, it is go to the start up to the Coda mark. The coda is not long enough, though. Could be longer.

In conclusion, You have great composition ideas, but you still need more practice. Overall, I would rate this piece of music a 8.5 out of 10. 

Have a nice day!

-TristanTheTristan

I also enjoy that part and, both the Maestoso together with the set of bars that you pointed out are my favorite part of the piece! Glad you enjoyed it too!

Yes, the ending is quite overwhelming. I am not good at writing Codas but I am going to extend it for the final version, even if it is only a couple of extra bars. The ending now sounds too rushed and probably a few more bars to let the ending breath will improve it. 

8.5/10 is really good!! Thank you so much for your encouragement and the nice words!! 

Thanks for listening and commenting!

18 hours ago, Kvothe said:

As Tristan mentioned, the tempo is slower than presto.   When Chopin wrote his, he rarely used a tempo marking.  The engraver added them later; or it was up to performer. So my suggestion would be is: have a pianist play through and then ask for feedback from them. Ask him or her, what tempo should you mark and other feedback. 

I notice the notation error. You are using a hemolia: a doted quarter followed by three 8ths grouped together. do not that. It makes it appear you are in 6/8 and not in 3/4.  

Thank you so much for letting me know about the notation error, @Kvothe! Because of the grouping the first bar (and similar ones) might be understood as 6/8. I did not know it but now I totally understand it. Thanks for noticing! I will fix it for the final version. 

Also, regarding the tempo, I guess I could get rid of tempo marking since the expression marks such as "agitato" might be enough to convey the mood of the piece. Sadly, I do not know any pianist, so I cannot get real-life feedback, but I will try to find out about how tempo markings are normally used! For this piece, do you have any particular suggestion about which tempo marking would fit best? 

Thanks for commenting!

16 hours ago, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

Hey @JorgeDavid!  Long time no see!

I think this is a very quaint little waltz that you've performed yourself!  I don't think you're having as many troubles performing it as you make us think saying that you "need more practice"!  LoL  My favorite parts of this are the unexpected cross relations between the melody and bass like in bars 4 and 20.  In bar 4 you have a G natural in the melody contradicted by a G# in the bass while in bar 20 you have a D in the melody with a D# in the bass - great idea!  Usually these kinds of cross relations would be heard as mistakes in A minor but you used them deliberately and made them sound intended and I really enjoyed them!  Great job and thanks for sharing!

P.S.:  I think even if you were using a notation program to realize a rendition of this instead of performing it yourself - in Musescore, for example, I would liberally use rit.'s and accel.'s to make the tempo sound more rubato and humanized.

Long time no see, @PeterthePapercomPoser. Exactly around 6 months! Hope everything is going great! I was really busy and ran into another musical hiatus where I could not practice or study at all, but I finally restarted it last week. I was planning to focus on learning, instead of composing, as I want to improve my technique and also go through some partimento (rule of the octave, schematas, etc) and jazz practicing. But, after 3 days of piano, I happened to compose again 😅 Now that I am practicing again I will try to browse more often through the forum, I have seen you have kept on with your microtonal pieces!

Thanks for your feedback! I also like that from the piece. I always had a tendency to use cross relations without even realizing, particularly in counterpoint, as I enjoyed the sound but in this piece, that G/G# one surprised me (I realized once I composed it), since it is on the same beat and on a strong beat. I think my ear grew used to major seventh dissonances from when I learned a little bit of jazz 😆  

Thank you so much for commenting!