"Semiquincentennial" for String Orchestra

This is a short thing I wrote in one day, perhaps a bit self-indulgently expressing my rather, shall we say... mixed... feelings right now about my country as we near the 250th anniversary of independence. The cellos play the melody of "America the Beautiful" while the violins and violas add harmonies that subvert the simple tune. As always, any comments or feedback would be appreciated!

Semiquincentennial.pdf

Hello! Interesting piece to have listened to. I must apologize now as I have some comments and in an effort to stay concise, I will be blunt. Here are my thoughts: (view on PC if able, not mobile)

1. Double check the alignment of your diminuendos and crescendos. To me, it casts the illusion that the score is a little unpolished:

   

2. With the slur groupings (two-note slurs), was it your intention to make it an ensemble feature? I saw some spots that have two-note slurs in one instrument, but not the others, even when the gestures feels the same: Measures 2 and 6 (in cello) as one example.

3. Last thing would be dynamics themselves. If cello is the main feature, I think it a little asymmetrical to have the violin 1 be a dynamic marking louder than the melody. Shouldn't the cello be the loudest voice when presenting the melody?

4. With the tempo markings, I think it looks better and easier to read when the text is a font size or two bigger or in bold. As a performer, it helps visually distinct the two text field types.

5. Last few picky things would be measures 8,14 and 21. Why not just use a half rest for the other voices on beats 3-4?

6. For the ending 4-bars, why not write "Sempre diminuendo" meaning "Always Diminishing" or "Morendo" to imply "dying away". Your pianissimo to Niente dynamic is a little messy with the spacing not consistent between all instruments.
   

Final thing is to double check/ update is the idea of adding copyright information and a subtitle to say "for String Orchestra" or "for String Quartet". This helps as on first look of the score, the ensemble size is not mentioned. Good work!