Dawn and Nightfall | String Orchestra

I decided to not waste my life and compose something*. Sibelius crashed so I used musescore.

This song is meant to sound not evil or phonk. I spent around idk like maybe 30-40 hours on this piece in total? I tried to use some "counterpoint" but since I am not good at music theory I have no idea whether I did it correctly. I used caesura's 3 times in total. Again I don't know if that's correct or not. Also, some voice crossings are in there, but I couldn't find it. I honestly have no clue how polished the piece is, it's one of my first 10 pieces. I started it in like 8th grade and finished it this summer (going into 9th grade) in case anyone decides to comment on how dogwater my skills are. Also, first time using tremolo in any piece. I play violin well, CM'd like 2 years so I'm PRETTY sure the violin portion is playable and well, but I have 0 clue about the other parts because I don't play any of the other string instruments.

Most of the song is in the last part.... another issue probobly

That said, well, I would like some feedback. ESPECIALLY in these spots:

1. Middle section, I don't know why I wrote it but, is it fitting? It's slow and not very "elaborate" and also it's placed weirdly IMO cause it's like supposed to be in the middle, but it's also not really centered. the part after it is MUCH more than the first portion. It's like centered but not centered but also centered but technically not centered but also IG kind of centered, but like it's not really centered.

2. Whole notes. I know like barber do it often especially in adagio but a bunch of people I saw in like online threads saying like that whole notes are generally not good? IDK I personally don't mind it too much but yeah.

3. counterpoint, I feel like I messed it up bad, but then I don't know how to improve it

4. dynamics. I know there is MASSIVE room for improvement because, yeah, it's really bad

5. Structure. I never studied structure before, so I have no idea what is what. I TRIED to use like ABA but the second A portion is very off balanced. So the structure is trash and could use much improvement

Thank you for your critique in advance, and thank you for your time.

*I'm composing because I broke my nvidia rtx 5090 and now I can't play games at 1000 fps so I quit entirely

Dawn-and-nightfall.pdf

Edited 1 hour ago1 hr by Hengyi
forgot something bruh

1 hour ago, Hengyi said:

I decided to not waste my life and compose something*. Sibelius crashed so I used musescore.

This song is meant to sound not evil or phonk. I spent around idk like maybe 30-40 hours on this piece in total? I tried to use some "counterpoint" but since I am not good at music theory I have no idea whether I did it correctly. I used caesura's 3 times in total. Again I don't know if that's correct or not. Also, some voice crossings are in there, but I couldn't find it. I honestly have no clue how polished the piece is, it's one of my first 10 pieces. I started it in like 8th grade and finished it this summer (going into 9th grade) in case anyone decides to comment on how dogwater my skills are. Also, first time using tremolo in any piece. I play violin well, CM'd like 2 years so I'm PRETTY sure the violin portion is playable and well, but I have 0 clue about the other parts because I don't play any of the other string instruments.

Most of the song is in the last part.... another issue probobly

That said, well, I would like some feedback. ESPECIALLY in these spots:

1. Middle section, I don't know why I wrote it but, is it fitting? It's slow and not very "elaborate" and also it's placed weirdly IMO cause it's like supposed to be in the middle, but it's also not really centered. the part after it is MUCH more than the first portion. It's like centered but not centered but also centered but technically not centered but also IG kind of centered, but like it's not really centered.

2. Whole notes. I know like barber do it often especially in adagio but a bunch of people I saw in like online threads saying like that whole notes are generally not good? IDK I personally don't mind it too much but yeah.

3. counterpoint, I feel like I messed it up bad, but then I don't know how to improve it

4. dynamics. I know there is MASSIVE room for improvement because, yeah, it's really bad

5. Structure. I never studied structure before, so I have no idea what is what. I TRIED to use like ABA but the second A portion is very off balanced. So the structure is trash and could use much improvement

Thank you for your critique in advance, and thank you for your time.

*I'm composing because I broke my nvidia rtx 5090 and now I can't play games at 1000 fps so I quit entirely

Welcome to the forum! Let be one of the first to say hello and congratulate you on this endeavour. All of us know how hard creating a convincing and satisfying piece of music can be, let alone an original one! You are off to a great start, one of which not all adults can do. I enjoyed listening to your piece. This said, I do have initial comments and a deeper set of specific annotations I would like to share later.

Here are my initial comments:

1. The ensemble balance is too similar for too long.

   • Violin 1 & 2 dominate the piece, and the other strings just act as support versus having a convincing conversation/ role in the piece.

2. Use of whole notes is more than okay. If you like it, then keep them!

   • This said, having a lack of pulse in the texture can make the music feel stagnant. Some of the other comments you have received may have been coming from this angle. To add, since the violins dominate the music over the course of 4 minutes, it makes the listener "zone out" as nothing major changed to their ear.

3. Do not forget about slurs!

   • As a string player, remind yourself that the use of a slur conveys bowing information. Even if you are not as aware as the other bowing styles, using slurs is a great way to showcase bowing information. The context of the music will inform them whether to up-bow or down-bow.

4. Creating motion.

   • To help the "stagnant" nature of the piece, one way to create motion is this: When the melody is slow, move the accompaniment. When the melody is moving, slow the accompaniment. Doing this will help drive the piece forward in a simple manner.

5. Using rests for effect!

   • While Barber's Adagio for strings is wonderful, remind yourself that even in such a thick and lush piece of music, he used silence for effect. Not all instruments need to play at the same time, nor do they always need to play in the same octave. You have the whole string section to move and pass ideas around. Strings can do double stops and divisi playing. It's another way to create an effect as using silence will elevate the moments you use all the sounds or all the instruments.

Keep up the good work!