Suicide's Note

Something I wrote. It's pretty much just experimenting, just getting back into writing for the first time in months. Feedback would be nice. I do realize that there are no dynamics, articulation markings, and that overall it is rather poor due to the angular melody, difficult clustering of tones, poor melodic phrasing in inner parts, lack of structure/form/devlopment, etc. But I felt like posting it for fun.

suicide's note.MUS

Suicide's Note.pdf

might you consider starting this with a pick-up beat for the word "the"?

The poem is really beautiful, and it seems strange to start with "THE" on an accented 1st beat. It's accented being on the 1st beat, and doubly accented since it's also the highest note of that short phrase.

I think this needs some dynamics. Maybe some articulation markings. I like it, but overall, it's rather poor, due to the angular melody, difficult clustering of tones, poor melodic phrasing in the inner parts, and general lack of structure, form, and development. lol

I actually like this a lot. The lyrics are great (I imagine this as part of a song cycle about 'love lost' or something), and I like the ideas you have for how it should sound when embodied into a choral work. I'd definitely love to see/hear a finished work if you continue. Kudos.