Jap War

This is my first post ever here, so I thought it would be correct to post one of my earliest songs I composed. The song is called Jap War, its not the typical classical music everyone expects, i owe a lot of my inspiration to the early minimalist style, and although I wont concider my music in the minimalist style, I do realize that my repetition and simplicity will make people think of it as minimal. The song was composed as a...March you could say. It starts out with a flute and the timpani responding it. And well by the end you see war itself, man marching out to war shooting people for fun. So enjoy and please comment about it. Thanks.

Jap_War_.mid

Very cute one. I liked that echoing effect in the second part. One suggestion would be to use either more layers of bass or to find an softer way to break unitone ostinato in bass in the first part. Imo, some traingle accents would sound great too. For the second part I would consider something deep an frequently vibrating in low, and something more aggressive in middle register. Subtle introduce to both, of course.

This is not a critique of yours, but in general, I wonder how many songs on this board have something to do with WAR

And why in the world does it have such a derogatory name like "Jap"?

First of all, its my only song in here that has to do with war. The only song I've ever written about war. And why jap? Cuz...it sounds jap...Japan, as we all know, dosent have a very..."peaceful" history. I didnt mean to offend anyone...

That is extremely offensive to the Japanese. They are very proud of their heritage and wouldn't be too happy to come on here and see Jap War. I, not even Japanese, am quite offended as I thought our country had long since seen out the days of calling Japanese "Japs" and blacks "black persons". I am appearantly very wrong.

Extremely wrong. You can't expect to believe that racial slurs are no longer used anywhere. Are you mad? Have you been living under a rock? These are some of the most intolerant times in this nation's history.

And, yes, the name is quite offensive, and is the main reason I haven't listened to it yet.

Sean Christopher Stork

Nightengale Incorporated

Well, my friends, THAT is exactly what art is. To one man, an expresion, to another an insult. If we start to think, as we have, that people have no right to be offended, well you're wrong. We've all been offended at one point in life. And what i suggest is for ppl to grow up, and accept things as it is. Acceptence, thats what this world needs. U accept me, I accept you. Stop these demands for everything to be "correct". And Jap war is just an expression of MY point of view.

Sorry to all you self-righteous regulars, but Exemos is very correct here. It's his piece and he has the right to call it whatever he pleases if it conveys his message or contributes to his enjoyment and satisfaction of it. How about we all get over the title and get to the actual piece; you know, the point of this thread? :)

My comments on the piece:

Very filmy, it's interesting and well-written. It is simplistic, as you said; but tastefully so for the most part. You manage to keep it just above the brink of boredom in some parts and have it quite exciting in others so overall it's well done that way. I think some exploration with having more than 2 instruments playing at once would be nice, it sounds really hollow a lot of the time and would benefit a good deal from some orchestrating. Your ending is the obvious exception to this; it's excellent! ...ish. You build up well and have a good sense of movement going. The problem is that a) I don't see any solider marching to war; I see more of a trailer to an X-Men movie and b) the ending itself is completely unsatisfying. You build up so nicely and then drop off with this dumb fart of an ending. I think you should seriously consider ending with a bang; especially if you want it to seem like war. War doesn't end in farts after all, it ends in bangs. Though technically a fart could cause a bang if there was fire around. Which there isn't. But you could argue that there is fire in war...but I digress.

Overall, excellent piece. Needs some more colour, some orchestration and a rethought ending but otherwise it's very good.

Keep it up :thumbsup:

Racial slurs are not permitted here under any circumstances - even in the title of a work. Let's be frank: if someone posted a piece called "black person Baby Doll" or "Pickaninnies On Parade," this would already have been deleted.

I know it seems fatally "PC," but unfortunately, regardless of the quality of the actual piece, the title skirts the very edge of what's allowable here. I'm consulting the other mods before I take action unilaterally.

WRONG! Racial slurs are NOT an expression, it's about predetermined hate regardless of the kind of person it is based entirely race/creed/ and religion. To have a different opinion is one thing, and to be offensive is another. Some might find my music offensive, but I don't purposely seek out that kind of attention. You are offensive on quite a different level, and no amount of rights of expression gives you the right to slander an entire race of men just because you have an opinion. And I have my rights of expression as well. Let me express to you and every other person that reads this that I will have nothing to do with you as a composer or in any other way. You're rude, vile, and prejudiced, and I will not have my name associated with yours in any way.

Sean Christopher Stork

Nightengale Incorporated

Sorry this has to be your introduction to the site, Exemos. You might check out the Board Rules.

*sigh* I tried. But I am over-ruled. :thumbsup:

It's weird though, I have this nagging feeling that when Exemos posted this piece, he was looking for comments on the music, not the title. Just a thought. :)

Exemos do not worry about Austin A.K.A FPshubert, he is a jerk and will argue over anything, make a mountain over a mole hill. Just steer clear of him and you will be fine. Also, I would suggest that next time you name your piece "Japanese War" because there are people on here that will take things the wrong way, just like in the real world, just do not worry about Austin, he'll dig his big nose in anything, trying to start an argument, basically i think that is his life goal to argue. Just a suggestion!

Also I thought that it was very rude, on the account of the other youngcomposers just being very rude towards Exemos, You should have explained some of the "Rules" here at young composers for him before barking down his throat?!?! Also should this not be in the free-for-all or its language, like the n word and such because some take that as serious as a swear word, did you ever think of that? :)

I liked your piece a lot. I especially liked the simplicity of it and how it sort of "had a building effect" to something much bigger and greater. The repetitive nature also was very cool, Keep up the good work, I am sure we will hear many many other good things from you here at YoungComposers! Good Luck!

I truly thank both of you that stood up for me. From the bottom of my heart I thank you. I never thought that that title would offend anyone...its not suppose to. But enough about that. I just want to thank you both.

And if its Jap War, its Jap war. If the administrators are offended by it, then go ahead take it out. Thats not the only piece I have...again, thank you both.

And now for me to stick my big nose in like Musicman so accurately described (you really did do a good description of me!). It is not only rude to assume that no one would be offended by that title. Most people don't appreciate racist names and therefore see the piece as bad or resent even listening to it. How do you know there isn't someone who is Japanese here? In fact one of our newer members is appearantly Japanese by heritage. I do hope he doesn't see this, he probably would be terribly insulted. Racialism (Python lovers should get that) is not meant to be on an online forum, so many people here are of different backgrounds including the ones so often demeaned by derogatory comments. I say we should all say "I am not a racialist!"

Nah, they'll just change the title to something politically correct that'll suit their tastes.

Like: "Musical Reflection on a Far-Eastern Feudal Culture's Aggressive Civil Disagreement"

Pathetic.

I truly thank both of you that stood up for me. From the bottom of my heart I thank you. I never thought that that title would offend anyone...its not suppose to. But enough about that. I just want to thank you both.

And if its Jap War, its Jap war. If the administrators are offended by it, then go ahead take it out. Thats not the only piece I have...again, thank you both.

You are most Welcome Exemos, Do not even worry about it. I am not offended by it and I thought it was a good piece as I had stated before. :)

Really...you people like to argue dont you? You cant accept an insult? What, I come from mexican backgrounds, and if they name a piece Mex War, or even Wet Back war, I DONT CARE! A TITLE DOSE NOT GIVE ANYTHING! A tittle is a title! Not a description, not a summary. It is A TITTLE. If a book is named Jelousy, and its about cats and dogs, does it make the book BAD? NO! So just accept the title, and MOVE ON!

Wow! I was actually right! He posted it to get comments on the piece, not the title! Whod've thought? :)

And now for me to stick my big nose in like Musicman so accurately described (you really did do a good description of me!). It is not only rude to assume that no one would be offended by that title. Most people don't appreciate racist names and therefore see the piece as bad or resent even listening to it. How do you know there isn't someone who is Japanese here? In fact one of our newer members is appearantly Japanese by heritage. I do hope he doesn't see this, he probably would be terribly insulted. Racialism (Python lovers should get that) is not meant to be on an online forum, so many people here are of different backgrounds including the ones so often demeaned by derogatory comments. I say we should all say "I am not a racialist!"

Also I'll more accurately describe you, "People like you don't belong on online forums" because they love to cause trouble and are not as "Smart" as the rest of us. :)

Wow! I was actually right! He posted it to get comments on the piece, not the title! Whod've thought? :)

You've got quite a bit of gaul coming in here telling us old farts (figuratively) what to do. Even though you are a Mexican who doesn't care about being racially insulted has no entailments of you getting to do the same to others. For the betterment of the community I would say the name should be changed to something more politically correct (not so severly as Marius suggested) but perhaps "Japanese War". I'm no longer a part of this discussion.

I wont change the name...I dont care, I'm sorry, it's MY piece, I should choose the title, the notes, the lenght, everything. Not people out there. So...No I wont change the name. So forgett about it...