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Usually, I don't write orchestral pieces. I think I'm not ready, yet.

However, I feel comfortable with atonality, with "classic" atonality, the way it was described by Schönberg and friends. I take atonality as a tool, one more tool, to compose. I mean, I'm not afraid (I like it) of mixing languages.

This is just an attempt. Classic atonality uses small orchestral ensembles, this is easier to manage (for me).

The piece ends suddenly. I wanted to be so.

Not bad. It is somewhere between Schonberg and Webern. It is fragmentary yet not pointilistic. Perhaps it is too clear in rhythm to be properly convincing.

Thanks, you're right. One of the essentials in atonality is the irregular rhythm. I'll try other version (just for me) having that in mind.

I don't know much about atonal writing, but I did enjoy it. Comparing it with pieces I have heard by Shoenberg and Berg I can agree with Sojar that the rhythms seem more simple than I would expect from an atonal piece. Also I'm worried a little about your timpani part. There are many different notes located close together, some of them chromatic, and I'm not entirely sure how playable it would be. I'm sure it could be pulled off with pedals, but it would probably end up sounding muddy. Just a thought. 

In general, you've convinced me that you understand atonality well enough to use it and still create an enjoyable bunch of sounds. A lot of composers (myself included) don't have this skill, so congratulations.