A Mother's Arms - AHHH HELP!

So I have this nice little contemporary SATB no accomp thing going on. Without thinking/planning, I just wrote, and unfortunately (and I guess fortunately at the same time), I have a climax done, but I don't have any drama to make it worthwhile. Can anyone give me some guidance as to how I can turn this small poem that I'm using into a sizeable work?

Thanks.

Mother's Arms.3 - no intro 092106 copy.mus

Maybe he should have called it mother's love, Mother's arms sounds kinda like severed limbs a little

Maybe he should have called it mother's love, Mother's arms sounds kinda like severed limbs a little

Gee, I'm sorry for disturbing your virgin ears with a few major 7ths, 9ths, and 11ths. Maybe next time I'll stick with the circle of fourths. Would that make you feel better?

Could someone please give me some constructive criticsm. If all you can do is hear chord progressions like I V I V7 I, then don't comment.

Apparently that's all Will Kirk listens to.

Good grief, no, there's nothing wrong with the harmony as long as you have a decent 12-part ensemble (inlcuding the extra tenors). I take it this is therefore written for a fairly big choir.

Where you left off - you'd started speeding things up and it's worth carrying on like that, maybe another couple of bars with more conventional harmony at 1/8-note movement, then revert to the more dissonant, slower stuff for the closing bit: "Nestled..." The faster bit may sound a little short then - you'd have to see - so you may need just to repeat the text of the 2 penultimate lines (with different harmony of course).

I don't know how you're going to handle the tenor part in bar 6. You need two extra for that. In this .mus version those extra parts (the pretty red ones) seem fairly ineffectual though you could marcaro them in real life.

When I saw the title I first thought of a Coat of Arms (a piece of classsical brit culture). I reckon all you have to do is prefix the title with "In".

In a mother's arms.

There's at least one other member really expert at this genre in live performance. Hopefully he'll comment.

M

Gee, I'm sorry for disturbing your virgin ears with a few major 7ths, 9ths, and 11ths. Maybe next time I'll stick with the circle of fourths. Would that make you feel better?

Could someone please give me some constructive criticsm. If all you can do is hear chord progressions like I V I V7 I, then don't comment.

Apparently that's all Will Kirk listens to.

Wow....someone's touchy.

I'm pretty sure he was simply referring to the Title, which, I agree is a little creepy...nothing to do with the music. "In A Mother's Arms" is infinitely better.

but whatever...

Gee, I'm sorry for disturbing your virgin ears with a few major 7ths, 9ths, and 11ths. Maybe next time I'll stick with the circle of fourths. Would that make you feel better?

Could someone please give me some constructive criticsm. If all you can do is hear chord progressions like I V I V7 I, then don't comment.

Apparently that's all Will Kirk listens to.

uhh dude, I wasn't criticising the piece, it was just a joke, I actually enjoyed the piece alot, what gave you the impression I didn't?

A short comment to Larson !

I like the idea of beginning with something that might reminds the Lulluby of Brahms with the accending minor third !! I expect that you will put pianissimo dynamics on the start isn't it !? For dissonance increase with dynamic level and that might not really serve the purpose of your texte. But then again it might not be the effect you seek. What is the effect of the harmony you're searching for !? (don't worry for the cycle of fourth, I can hear complexe harmony! I'm not judging the use but the effect searched!)

It can be sang by choirs, but as you need so much singers why not consider leaving for part for a small ensemble of horns or at winds... but horns would more achieve here what I feel your searching for and they blend well with voices.

Maybe this text could be a good opportunity to try out some counterpoint. If you like to have complexe harmonies with 11th and 13th, I could help you out a bit with that. I'm actually working on a conterpoint technique for 6 voices that uses the 6 most consonnant vertical consonnances (instead of the 3 notes of the triad that was used in the great renaissance period (great for choir works)). So depending on your wish I can help you there.

The thing I guess that might make that 'you don't know how to continu this work' is probably that it would need a more clear sens of 'where are you going with all this ?!!'. Using more complexe harmonies with as much as 7 different notes isn't something simple... even more for a choir. Of course you could listen to choir works by Xenakis or Ligetti or other composer such as these that use very complexe harmonies - or clusters actually - but they use in in such a way that is profiled - shaped.

That's the main critic of the harmony you use in that segment... you have to find a way to profile the music, to shape it so that the listener can have an idea (even if small) of where you are going.

The thing about tonal music is that these progressions of fourths is so codified that the listener knows where you are heading. But harmony isn't everything. Lots of inconsistent stuff is written daily with tonal harmony (not on that forum fortunatly !!). But it becomes even more necessary to become sly in your ways of writting if you use more complexe harmonies. You must drive the listener in something even more clear. If an eerie or mysterious ambiance is sought, then shape it accordingly. A more dramatic effect wouldn't be written the same at all.

SO... you have to know what you want in order to be able to shape it clearly.

I could write more, but maybe think a bit about all that already and if you want, tell me more about what you're searching for... and you really have to revise the voicing... Montpellier's comment is true. I counsell two this for this :

1. As I said you create a file with a 6 voices-part choir (Soprano, mezzo, alto, tenor, baryton and bass) and add a small brass ensemble (or organ if that it's a sonority you're searching for... but know that with the types of harmonies you work with a brass ensemble will sound much better).

2. Keep the '4' voice parts without instruments but systematically use 2 voices per staff line unless there is a long time that is only four voices (where you will have to write 'tutti'). But if you do so, try to be a bit more flexible for the chorist to take their notes from somewhere when they have note inside clusters or at very dissonant pitches like minor 9th... which is very rough for chorists (being one, I can tell ! eheh).

Does it help !? I haven't told you how to finish the piece (and I won't) but do you have questions or does it help you a bit !?

Don't forget : dynamics ! tempo signs and I know it's far from finished yet, but don't forget to write the words when the rythms are very different (like sustained notes at mes.18).

Wow....someone's touchy.

I'm pretty sure he was simply referring to the Title, which, I agree is a little creepy...nothing to do with the music. "In A Mother's Arms" is infinitely better.

but whatever...

Yes Robin, that's exactly what I was refrencing

I attend a small private school and have received close to no compositional training, so any help you dispense is really appreciated!

Sorry for that original comment - I had a lot of Calc homework and it was getting late, so I was probably very crabby. That's no excuse, but w/e.

I'll definitely do that horn section - that will work very nicely. I'll post a new version of the file as soon as I get there.

thanks!

Let me suggest 4 horns and 2 tubas... I counsel not to mixt trumpets and trombones with these... they won't mixt with the voice but mixt the voice with them... I don't know if you see the subtility of this... If you need something going higher than the horns... a flugglehorn would be better than a trumpet with this ensemble. It can go as high (even if it's very tiring) as soprani do.