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I love that instrumentation. Very clever. I'm with maestrowick on your rhythms; many of them are written out very strangely, especially when you add dotted versions of or within certain phrases. They may look and sound right theoretically, but even with rehearsal, it almost becomes aleatoric when things are placed in that realm. The ending I quite like and works in irony with your intended message. Interesting. My issue was with development. Even in serialist music, a motif isn't enough. You'll look at Webern's Opus 21 and see how things, even with similarly layered rows, are not the end all be all structure of a piece. It sounds like a lot of the same here... I'd personally recommend a bit more developmental homophony or isolated counterpoint to make the arc more clear. Cheers!

Water's definitely good for you, but I've heard that eight glasses is overkill. Not entirely sure about that. I've been trying to write a cello concerto and compete with it in a concerto competition! I have so many ideas to put in but not the transition skills necessary to pull all of them off . To the chopping block, perhaps.

That sounds like a full plate! My new year's resolution is to drink more water. 8 glasses. It's not as easy as you think. I'm coming along very well on my symphony so far. It's here somewhere, check it out!