A newbie's first submission

Hey everyone. I've been an amateur composer for a few years now and recently a friend suggested I find an online community to share my music with and get some advice/critique. This place seems perfect for that.

I've had a few years of very basic music instruction the piano and violin as a kid, but I have no professional experience other than that.

sonatapart1.mp3 - File Shared from Box.net - Free Online File Storage

Let me know what you think. It's not entirely finished yet. I also don't really like that it sounds more like 2-3 seperate songs than one. Any criticism you guys can offer, even if it's really harsh, would be greatly appreciated!

EDIT: Oops, I guess I registered this account a long time ago. I just never really used it.

The recording is very muddy so its hard to hear what you really have. Do you have a MIDI version or a notated version, such as Finale Notepad? From what I could hear, it seemed to end in the middle and there wasn't a clear sense of organization, especially organization that I could recognize as a sonata form. If you need this much reverb and ambience for it to sound good, that isn't a good sign.

The recording is very muddy so its hard to hear what you really have. Do you have a MIDI version or a notated version, such as Finale Notepad? From what I could hear, it seemed to end in the middle and there wasn't a clear sense of organization, especially organization that I could recognize as a sonata form. If you need this much reverb and ambience for it to sound good, that isn't a good sign.

Yeah, I'll attach the midi version. And yeah just disregard the filename where it said sonata, i forgot about that, but I know it isn't a sonata

song.mid

Much better in MIDI with less reverb. You may also be overusing the pedal. I like it a lot for the first 55 seconds or so. Once you start the fast part, the sense of structure seems to disappear and it feels like you are just pounding on the piano. I think there is a lot of potential with the matierial in the first 55 seconds, you could keep the set of tempos you have in there (it is already a good range) and elaborate in terms of keys and harmonies, pull apart your motives, tease your rhythms, etc.

After the gap is clearly something else, less polished with some wrong notes even, and you should just remove it. I don't hear anything in there that sounds good.

I like the first 55 seconds as well, and I think that the section right after it has potential but it's just too muddled. Personally if I were composing the piece I'd consider making :55 to 1:47 more easily listenable, and scrapping the part from about 1:47 on and instead reprising part of the opening section but making it a little different. It has potential, keep working at it!

Wow I am really impressed. I don't know about calling it a sonata because its not in sonata form maybe rhapsody would be a better title. I am really impressed you created this because of your lack of experience. Keep working on it!!! I want to hear the end result! Try and connecting the three distinct sections some how either by repetition of by infusing themes into sections, but I am really not a expert on that kinda stuff. Great job!

i really enjoyed listening to it! :D

i like the rolling notes in the left hand.

are you sure you wanna call it a sonata? i agree with Muzic about the title.

The section from the start to 55 seconds or so is really good. The only problem I really have with piece is that it's impossible to play. Maybe it's just me, but I tend to prefer music that's playable by a real instrument :thumbsup:.