My 1st Choral ~ The Grace

This my 1st time to make a choral works...

That's why the song is really simple...

I hope someone could hear it (I attach the score too),

then give me some comments, advice, or even better, critics...

Please understand, this is my 1st time, so it'd has a lot of mistakes (probably)...

THANKS :)

~ SoundClick artist: the lynx (INA) - page with MP3 music downloads

The Grace.pdf

I heard the mp3 and I liked it.. so sweet.

I can't view the pdf file because I got problem with my reader. I maybe back some other time to see the score and say more comments about the piece.

yup, thanx a lot... :)

Dude... it's nice! Try to add some words to it! Yeah... there are a few mistakes, but just look it over and fix it.

Good luck!

what do U mean with mistakes?

well, I mean, in what part do I make mistakes?

thanx...

There REALLY should be words. In fact is usually best to start with words.

I write a lot of choral music, but I'm really bad with words. Unfortunately, choral music needs words. You should find a text to go with this, in whatever language is most comfortable, religious or non, even make one up yourself. I'm really bad at finding texts that work for music I've already written, so sometimes I just use syllables--"da" or "doo" or "loo," or even solfege syllables. Generally, it is easier to start a choral piece with words.

Music-wise, this is really nice. There are a few measures with a bit of dissonance that sound like wrong notes (6, 12, and 15 spring to mind). This is a very tonal piece, and those notes just don't seem to fit. Dissonance can be really nice if it doesn't sound like an accident. If you want sevenths in there, keep them around for more than one beat, make them seem intentional. Play around with soft dissonances: in measure 7 you have what could turn into a gorgeous F9 or Am7 chord, for instance.

One of the tricks of writing for voice is that people tire more easily than instruments. Your soprano part seems pretty high, overall. Most non-professional sopranos get squeaky around a high G. It's just something to keep in mind: sopranos can hit all those notes no problem, but singing up around the high E-A range for a long time can get tiring/painful. Really, it depends on your group. (Don't quote me on that range, I'm no soprano, it just seems a little high.) All the other voice ranges look fine to me, though.

You've got a couple instances of parallel octaves in here (e.g. measure 7). They're fine for deliberate effect, but it's hard to tell without text. Mostly, parallel octaves serve to take away voices--when two voices are singing the same line, they become one voice, so you have fewer to work with and you get a less rich sound. Consider changing some of the parallel lines to fill out your chords (or even when you just have two voices on the same note).

I like the piano part quite a lot. Just a stylistic suggestion: when the choir holds whole notes over the piano part, what would you think of either changing the whole note to a half note, or holding the note even longer? Just an idea to play with. Cheers!

I'm back. ;)

Now I see the score. I really like this one. Uhmm.. Where to begin?

1. The Lyrics. Yeah, they are all right. You should really post this piece with the lyrics. This is also one my major fault when I post my first composition in the forum. The text below will give you some good reasons.

theusii

I can not give a good comment since you present no text to it. Text affect harmony and rhythm and so as dynamics.

So that your piece can be dealt with accordingly, there are some things that are in need of consideration.

For example, you have a lot of notes above the staff. Its difficulty can be augmented or lessen depending on your choice of vowels and number of sounds which you will use in that particular tessitura.

It is also important because I found your piece with several counterpoints. The text must fit to it.

2. The Parallel Movements. Are you aiming for the independence of each part? Then I found a lot of parallel movements of your eights and fifths.

Parallel P8 - Measure 7, 8, 16, 18, 24, 25, 26 and 27

Parallel P5 - Measure 11

Well, I don't know if you intend to write all of these. Maianess have explained it more clearly.

But aside from these. I can't give more bad comments about this (probably because I lack my knowledge in theory and I don't really play piano).

I'm not having problem with the dissonances on bar 6. If I'm right, it is an up by fourth progression with a fourth then a seventh(iii-vii dim), and you make the right resolution for the both of them. --- or maybe this is just really an ear problem. :D

As for the overall sound. I'll thank God because there are still composers who are striving to achieve the clarity of a piece by not having so much suspended sounds ( I wish no one will argue about this, I prefer to write religious choral and it's a common practice). Yes, you use simple things here, but I bet many people would love to hear this short,sweet piece. :P

Oops..I think some critique may send me to an ophthalmologist. :whistling:

I look again at the score and I think I overlooked some mistakes.

1. The Dissonances (Measure 6). I am now having a problem with the use of that tension. Is it an E minor with the use of consecutive suspended fourths? Or an E minor progressed to A chord? Then if it is the second one, then the seventh tone wasn't resolved properly (Haha, I recognize this sound, maybe I also do this error if this is really a mistake).

2. The Sharp on Piano (Measure 21). B# = C. I don't see any essence of that note.

3.The Soprano-Alto Interval( Measure 17). It's a one-eleventh interval of the two parts. Well, it is not actually a big deal, but the practice is to write the first two voices within one octave. Again it's not an issue. (Maybe I'm just concern about it because I am a tenor and I love sing high notes, Lol.)

Congratulations for your first choral work. See you again in the forum. ;)

thanx for all your advice, critics...

i'll fix it soon...

i really appreciate this... :)

This is a really nice, simple piece. Sounds perfect for a middle school group or something along those lines. I look forward to seeing what words you come up with.

There are a couple spots that sound like they may have some wrong notes, but overall, a nice, pure and simple piece.