Variations in C

This is a work somewhat structured like a piano concerto, but i dont know if i would call it that. Its a collaboration with one of my friends. The work is orchestrated for Piano, piccolo, 2 flutes, oboe, 2 clarinets, bassoon, 4 horns, 2 trumpets, bass trombone, and strings.

Tell me what you think...

Thanks

Jordan.

To hear this composition, go here:

Jordan Jenkins on purevolume

Finale PrintMusic 2008 - [pianoconcertolalalala3 PRINT].pdf

Jordan

Welcome to YC

That was quite good.

I almost exited out of it due to the samples (which suck), but I figured why not listen anyway and I was able to ignore them and concentrate on the music.

At 2:34 and a few other spots, you have what sounds like castanets come in. It almost sounds like distortion in the mix.

Otherwise the piece has a few nice twists and turns in it.

If you want people here to comment on your music, it always helps to comment on some of theirs. Some will return the favor, (as it should be) while others are either too busy or too lame to take the few seconds required to type in a response. In time you will learn who will return the favor and who will not.

Hope that helps

Ron

Just a few things from reviewing the score...

-The piano should be placed in the score above the strings. and below the winds.

-Your bass trombone part would be difficult, and definitely unidiomatic. The high B (m35) would be incredibly difficult to get out. Not to mention the pedal E (m45) figure that is just pure fantasy.

-Piccolo rhythm at m31 is nonsensical.

-flagged single grace notes should have a line through the flag.

-Your woodwind (and brass) parts do not clearly indicate which player is playing.

-There's very little interest to your rhythm.

-There's also very little depth... the foreground/background difference is stark and uninteresting.

-Too much emphasis on doubling. Doubled octaves abound, particularly in the piano, which is tiresome.

-Much of the piece consists of simple arpeggios, which are uninteresting.

-Extremely few articulations/phrase indications.

I would say this is a poor/young effort and would encourage you to go through QcCowboy's Orchestration Masterclass.

Just a few things from reviewing the score...

I would say this is a poor/young effort and would encourage you to go through QcCowboy's Orchestration Masterclass.

Such words of encouragement are not always the case here at YC.

Bear that in mind before you decide to never come back.

Ron

Garratins online orchestration course is also a good resource for help.

If you are willing and wanting to improve, there is a lot of very good information and very good talent here.

If you just want happy, shiny, meaningless praise... don't look at me! :)

Flint

His very first post on the site and you say it is poor.

No one is asking for lies, but why cut down what may be someones first ever piece of music?

For all we know, this is a genious in the making.

I am not trying to single you out. I have just seen this happen too many times on this forum and the newbie never shows up again.

We can be better than that.

Ron

BTW Check out your first ever music post on this site

Hey,

I thought this wasn't bad :D

As flint has mentioned earlier there were some problems with the orchestration, perhaps condensing it down and arranging it for solo piano as a theme and variations would help?

Oscar

Thanks everyone.

i have no problem with constructive criticism and know that there will be problems with the orchestration. After all this is my first real finished attempt at a piece (at least for orchestra).

As i said before too, this is a collaboration, and the theme was basically written by my friend, and she originally composed it for solo piano, which is probably why it would sound better that way. She also did a bit of the orchestration, including some of the outrageous trombone parts.

Thank you all very much, i will take these suggestions and implement them into my future works.

Jordan