Seraphims

A piece written for piano, violin and bass. In this arrangement I used the cello. I drew my inspiration form the ideal of angels. I tried to capture beauty, elegance, grace and mystery, all traits I imagine angels to have. The sheet music I uploaded is for the piano which the bass and violin accompany for the most part. Any thoughts or criticism would greatly be appreciated.

Not "angles" -- "angels" :) Unless you draw mystical inspiration from geometry!

I like the the ideas you've presented here -- most of the chord changes were convincing to me, and even though a second voice would at times make the voice leading clearer, it seems pretty clear anyway, the way you have it set up. I even thought the key changes were done very nicely.

At first I wondered why you did not have the cello and bass on the score, but since the instruments aren't playing any notes different from what the score presents, it's not an issue :happy:

There are some notational oddities I see here that you'll probably want to polish, the most striking being the 8va command at measure 86 in the bass clef. Why not just make it a treble clef? And especially do this at measure 113. It would make it much easier to read.

Musically, something I think you could improve on is being more adventurous with the registral timbres you're given. In this piece, you pretty much stay in the middle or slightly high, and only towards the end do you explore the higher octaves. While I thought to myself that maybe you could use a little more of the higher octaves to add some etherealness to the piece, I also noticed that the deep bass notes are completely ignored.

Don't be afraid that the bass notes may detract from the atmosphere of the piece -- actually, when properly used, they can add a lot to a piece :nod:

Also, if you see your music as telling a sort of story, these explorations of timbre really help you to personify your music for you -- to make it real. It can force you to consider aspects of your music that may not even have occurred to you before. For example, if you were to include some deeper bass notes, what would it mean in relation to what you've written, and what you're intention is behind the piece? Where you've put it, does it make you feel unsettled? Are the seraphims being tempted to do something wrong, or arguing with one another for some reason? Or perhaps were you'd choose to put it, it adds a rich fullness to an important part of the music you've made. Perhaps at this point the seraphims have accomplished a beautiful, awe-inspiring task?

In other words, I'm not just saying to fiddle more with the deeper and higher register only because they're there to be fiddled with -- I'm saying it because they can add whole new dimensions and meanings to your work whenever you include them, and make the piece even more special to you as these things are added to it. And perhaps even to other people who listen to it! :D

Just some food for thought.

Thank you for sharing this -- I like the melody and atmosphere of the piece you've presented to us very much :phones:

Haha thank you for pointing out my spelling mistake, I defiantly was not talking about geometry!! Also thank you for the insight on the score and my music. I totally agree with what you are saying about the timber adding new depth and emotion to the piece. After listing to it again I can picture right where it would fit in. I will definitely re-examine this. Thank you again for taking the time to listen and evaluate my music.

I'm not sure what to say that Zach didn't say in his essay

I like your ideas here. Sounds really good, even though it didn't make me think of angels.

Thank you for the complement jawoodruff, so I am curious what did you think of when you heard this piece?