September 4, 20187 yr You have both the suspended 4th in your F major chord, as well as the resolved major third which gives a bit of an awkward change of styles right at the end of a phrase. The exception is the first time. The solo piano ostinato you use at 1:52 doesn't feel the most warranted. These emotional moments, and you do do this, can be used as a point of remembrance from the previous material standing alone. It just didn't feel like there was a big enough buildup or previous material to have it be there, especially since you crash right into it again instead of a build. 2:24's polychord is a little bit strange. It's nice that they're off by a whole step but confusing that they're off by tonality (major/minor). Not wrong, just doesn't match the rest of the material.
September 4, 20187 yr Great piece. I wasn't fully captivated until towards the 2:30 mark when the choir came in for the climax. Then on, it was beautiful.
September 4, 20187 yr Author 20 hours ago, Monarcheon said: You have both the suspended 4th in your F major chord, as well as the resolved major third which gives a bit of an awkward change of styles right at the end of a phrase. The exception is the first time. The solo piano ostinato you use at 1:52 doesn't feel the most warranted. These emotional moments, and you do do this, can be used as a point of remembrance from the previous material standing alone. It just didn't feel like there was a big enough buildup or previous material to have it be there, especially since you crash right into it again instead of a build. 2:24's polychord is a little bit strange. It's nice that they're off by a whole step but confusing that they're off by tonality (major/minor). Not wrong, just doesn't match the rest of the material. Thanks for you criticism!!! im going to improve!
September 4, 20187 yr Author 4 hours ago, Sepharite said: Great piece. I wasn't fully captivated until towards the 2:30 mark when the choir came in for the climax. Then on, it was beautiful. thanks for listening!!
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