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Which of these lieds is best?


atrombonist

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So I have three lieds I've written, and for college reasons I need to know which one is best. Please let me know which one you think is best!

The first one- Der Wandrers Nachtlied ("The Wanderer's Night Song," both parts)

https://musescore.com/owlman142/the-wanderers-nightsong

Der du von dem Himmel bist,
Alles Leid und Schmerzen stillest,
Den, der doppelt elend ist,
Doppelt mit Erquickung füllest;
Ach, ich bin des Treibens müde!
Was soll all der Schmerz und Lust?
Süßer Friede,
Komm, ach komm in meine Brust!

Über allen Gipfeln
Ist Ruh,
In allen Wipfeln
Spürest du
Kaum einen Hauch;
Die Vögelein schweigen im Walde.
Warte nur, balde
Ruhest du auch.

-------------------------------------------

Thou that from the heavens art,
Every pain and sorrow stillest,
And the doubly wretched heart
Doubly with refreshment fillest,
I am weary with contending!
Why this pain and desire?
Peace descending
Come ah, come into my breast!

Above all summits
it is calm.
In all the tree-tops
you feel
scarcely a breath;
the birds in the forest are silent.
Just wait, soon
you will rest as well.

The second one: Anliegen ("Wish")

https://musescore.com/owlman142/lied-2_5ish

O schönes Mädchen du,
Du mit dem schwarzen Haar,
Die du ans Fenster trittst,
Auf dem Balkone stehst!
Und stehst du wohl umsonst?
O stündest du für mich
Und zögst die Klinke los,
Wie glücklich wär ich da!
Wie schnell spräng ich nihauf!

---------------------------------------------


O beautiful girl you, 
you with the black hair 
That you step to the window, 
stand on the balcony ! 
And are you standing there for no reason?
O are you standing for me 
And unlocking the door?
How happy would I be there! 
How quickly I would jump up there!

The third one: Wehmut ("Melancholy")

https://musescore.com/owlman142/lied-3

Ihr verblühet, süße Rosen,
Meine Liebe trug euch nicht;
Blühtet, ach! dem Hoffnungslosen,
Dem der Gram die Seele bricht!

Jener Tage denk' ich trauernd,
Als ich, Engel, an dir hing,
Auf das erste Knöspchen lauernd
Früh zu meinem Garten ging;

Alle Blüten, alle Früchte
Noch zu deinen Füßen trug
Und vor deinem Angesichte
Hoffnung in dem Herzen schlug.

Ihr verblühet, süße Rosen,
Meine Liebe trug euch nicht;
Blühtet, ach! dem Hoffnungslosen,
Dem der Gram die Seele bricht.
 

------------------------------------------------------


You are wilting, sweet roses -
my love could not sustain you.
Bloom for hopelessness then,
for he whose soul is breaking from sorrow! 

I think mournfully of those days
when I hung on you, angel,
waiting for your first little bud
and going to my garden early;

Every blossom, every fruit
I carried to your feet;
and before your countenance,
hope throbbed in my heart.

You are wilting, sweet roses -
my love could not sustain you.
Bloom for hopelessness then,
for he whose soul is breaking from sorrow!

 

Thank you!

Edited by atrombonist
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I would tailor it to the schools you are applying to.  A more experimental school, interested in pushing compositional techniques forward into new harmonic or other areas might find the first one most appealing because the music illustrates the text in so many different ways.  A more prim and proper school focusing on the fundamentals might be more drawn to the more conventional structure and beauty of the second or third one.  

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  • 3 months later...
  • 1 month later...

Great work in all. I'll address each one:

1. I love the strong opening chords. They really set you up well. The modulation wasn't as shocking as you'd expect. Nicely done. I really like the bold interval movement of this one. It never gets stagnant. My only criticism is the use of sextuplets rather than two sets of triplets in m.56. Either way is correct, but for whatever reason, two sets of triplets seems more pleasing to the eye for me.

2. This lied was very easy to listen to! The melody was pure and beautiful and I especially appreciate the rhythmic interest you created at m. 30 that adds spice to an otherwise fairly simple piece.

3. For a melancholic piece, you selected the perfect chords/voicings and you created a brilliant melody. The arpeggiating piano line at m.28 is also a very pleasant effect, and I liked the solo voice at the end more than I thought I would. Only criticism on this one is switching to the octave treble clef. It might be a little easy to miss on a first read where writing 8va above the notes might be easier. Again it's correct, but just something that looks a little better in my opinion.

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