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Mark101

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Hi all,

 

I've not posted anything in quite some time now so I hope you'll give my new work a chance.  I'm at the stage where I would reall like some help before I print off the final draft.

 

Musically I'm pleased with the work and I don't plan any great changes.  Obviously I'm open to any comments about the music/musicality of the piece but also, I'm not a great engraver.  I would like to know what you think I should amend in the score as much as I would like to know what you think musically.

 

I should explain that this is a 'playback score'.  I have sibelius play the music to my piano and I record live to 

USB from the piano so this isn't a midi sound performance, it's the Yamaha CVP 501 concert grand.  To make the 'performance' as human as possible, I do take great pains to make the playback as authentic as I can.  That means that there are lots of accents and tenutos, lots of excessive pedal markings and oddly tied notes in some places and also many micro tempo changes that all go towards humanizing the playback.  Most of that would not appear in a real performance score.

 

I would like to produce a performance score so if you could look past all the above mentioned and help me out, I would really appreciate it.

 

A bit about the work.

 

It's a suite of short, impressionistic piano pieces under the title - La Dama de Murumendi (The Lady of Wall Mountain).  She is an ancient Basque Goddess that rules over the mostly inclement weather of that region.  The whole things last 15 minutes so it's not exactly short as a whole but each 'vignette' is only about 3 mins each.

 

The 1st piece is called 'Brisa'.  It represents the Goddess in the aspect of the wind.

The 2nd piece is called 'Lainoa'.  This is the Goddess in the aspect of mist and fog.

The 3rd piece is called 'Euria'.  The Goddess in the aspect of a rain storm.

The 4th piece is called 'Elurra'.  It's the Goddess in the aspect of snow and frost.

The 5th piece is called 'Berria'.  It's the Goddess in the aspect of renewal, the sun finally coming out.

 

I really would appreciate your opinions and any help you could give me.  Thanks in advance to anyone who listenes, I appreciate it.

 

The score

https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/emvg8a0rvj12tqxgj05er/La-Dama-de-Murumendi-pdf.pdf?rlkey=t93ga24ltjuur8if1hoygaf4q&dl=0

 

The music

https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/ncst5rw7ca0qhnhbe6v39/La-Dama-de-Murumendi.wav?rlkey=au94206kcz4c3g6uber9u402y&dl=0

 

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Hi Mark @Mark101,

You should really split the pieces to different posts!

I will just review each piece to gain you more exposure haha. The first piece is amazing and I really feel like myself bathing in winds of demisemiquavers. I freakingly love that modulation to C harmonic minor, reminds me a lot of the Japanese anime. The piece is indeed impressionistic with those pentatonics and colour chords. A very enjoyable piece and I will continue to review the other three pieces (except Elurra, since I have already reviewed it before)

Thx for sharing!

Henry

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Hi Henry, 

I did consider posting them separately but then you loose the idea of the suite. Thanks by the way, I do appreciate you listening and that modulation I have say I love too. I wasn't sure how to work my way back for the recapitulation but I really think it works. 

I will confess that Brisa and Elurra are my favorites. I like them all but I think they are the strongest of the 5.

Thanks again Henry 😊

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Hey Mark,

I've listened to the second movement Lainoa. I think it's equally strong comparing to the Brisa. Maybe it's less moving forward than the first movement given the tempo and figuration, but it provides a necessary rest and break for the suite as a whole, since the movement is surrounded by two fast paced movements.

It's clever and coherent of you to use the last phrase for the preceding movement for the main melody of this movement. I like this movement for its jazzy harmony. The movement of the left hand can be hard but it's so idiomatic, and I think the movement depicts the fog well with those dissonant chords which are unsure in nature. Thx for sharing and I will continue to review the remaining two movements, cheers.

Henry

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Thank you Henry, I really appreciate your time and effort, also I'm so pleased that you like the pieces.  With Lainoa, I tried to evoke a slow, cloying atmosphere and the tail end of Brisa, when isolated, did give me a sort of lighthouse effect with the sweeping, rising motif.  It's always hard to know how others will imagine for themselves, what you are trying to portray and so I'm glad that it seems to be coming across.

Thank you again for your kind words.

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Hi Mark,

I really enjoy your Ravel-esque or at least impressionistic flavors you portray here!  For the sake of convenience it would be much easier to listen to the individual movements if you included them here as individual mp3 files uploaded in order.  Plus links to other sites whether YouTube, dropbox or soundcloud often break when the composers for some reason that befuddles me, remove their accounts or delete their old compositions.

I like how you connect the end of Brisa to the beginning of Lainoa.  There is a clear harmonic/motivic link between them I think.  Euria starts with quite a wild flurry/gesture!  Although I find Euria quite tame with lots of space for the expected depiction of a rain storm.  I guess it starts raining in earnest at 134 though.  Elurra is more active and quietly frenzied and seems like it would be more appropriate for a rain storm while Euria seems more like the snow/frost movement!  LoL  But I do see some icy-ness in the high and quick piano figurations/ostinati.  Berria seems like maybe it would be even more effective a bit slower.  This one can perhaps benefit the most from the touch of a real pianist.

Overall - a great suite!  Thanks for sharing these and great job!

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Thank you so much Peter, I really appreciate you listening and your time in commenting. 

Yes it is probably a bit much to ask most casual listeners to hear the whole suite without a break. If I write another multi movement piece (or rather, when) I will upload it directly and individually. 

I think I had a problem in that the rain piece in my head was really a summer storm, not a heavy torrential downpour. Also I let the melodic progression take over rather than concentrating on the rain aspect I think. It has two clear halves where as you say it doesn't begin to pour down until the second half - I don't know, it's problematic. I didn't intend the 2 half thing, it just happened. 

I do really love the snow section, I can see the dancing, swirling flurries in my head but the next section, Berria, as you say, possibly should be a little slower and yes, 'interpreted' better. The truth about that section is that I found Lily Boulanger! 😂 She led me astray - while Berria doesn't have her harmonic language exactly, it changed from the Ravelian influences of the rest of the suite, which is also problematic 😂 

Anyway, it's all good to know for the re writes. Thank you again for your kind words. 

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Hi Mark,

I am continuing with Euria! I think the music is very effective depicting the rainstorm. First there is a storm, then rains are dropping quicker and quicker with unsettling major chords. For me the buildup to b.131 is very successful. Now in the second section the raindrops are more frequent but again with that weird major chord. That major chord reminds me of that horrible major third in the beginning of Prokofiev's Sixth Sonata, not of the force but the weird quality. Great piece!

I just re-listen to the Elurra and again it's marvellous.

For the last piece of the suite, Berroa acts as a great summation. Those thick quartal and quintal chords do provide a sense of rebirth and earth after all those weathers. The last chord of Elurra leads directly and smoothly to this movement. I love those parallel fifths and fourths very much here as it really represents the earthly power rather than the human power. I love the slower tempo and pace here too which gives good contrast to all the preceding pieces. The ending is peaceful and soothing.

This is for sure a very successful and remarkable piece. I will for sure make it to my next year's review if I am still here. Thx for sharing this great suite for us!

Henry

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Thank you Henry, I really appreciate your review of the whole suite, you are most kind to spend the time and effort on it and I consider it an honor that you did.

I'm sure I've mentioned before that I am not good at letting things lie!  So it is probably not surprising that I have tweeked things a little here and there.  I was never happy with the over dominance of D.  At the beginning it was a decision I made 'D' for la Dama but it was silly I think and I didn't like the transition out of the fog into the rain.  It seemed that as Lainoa ends in D major, starting Euria in D minor wasn't really working for me, especially since Brisa is also in a D centred pentatonic (mostly) and so I transposed Euria from D minor to E minor.  I think it works better as it's a little more jarring when the lightning strikes, I don't know, maybe???

Berria also has a minor change of tempo.  I've slowed it down a little to try and bring a little more tranquility to the piece.  I love the thick chords and the parallel fifths and fourths are meant to be a bit more earthy as you say so I'm glad that aspect comes across.  Personally I think it's the weakest piece and I may well fiddle with it some more in the weeks to come.  That's not to say I don't like it, I do, but it doesn't yet have the flair of the others, perhaps it doesn't need to, but there is just something that is not striking the right note so to speak LOL.  I'll get there.

My hopes, in posting (what really is an unpolished version) of the suite, or indeed any of my work, here is to get help with where the polish needs to be applied.  I am now working on the smallest details and you have been invaluable in this process, so I want to thank you very much for your time and your kind words, they mean a lot. 

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2 hours ago, Mark101 said:

I was never happy with the over dominance of D.  At the beginning it was a decision I made 'D' for la Dama but it was silly I think and I didn't like the transition out of the fog into the rain.  It seemed that as Lainoa ends in D major, starting Euria in D minor wasn't really working for me, especially since Brisa is also in a D centred pentatonic (mostly) and so I transposed Euria from D minor to E minor.  I think it works better as it's a little more jarring when the lightning strikes, I don't know, maybe???

Actually I may just go for D minor for the Euria as it is now the case. Laiona does end in D major, but in an unsettling way and it's not stable at all in the D major, so having D minor Euria following it is actuallu a great choice of key for me. Maybe I am used to Baroque suites, I never feel like repeating the keys boring and ovwr, but conversely it coheres the whole piece with the same tonal/modal centre.

2 hours ago, Mark101 said:

Personally I think it's the weakest piece and I may well fiddle with it some more in the weeks to come.  That's not to say I don't like it, I do, but it doesn't yet have the flair of the others, perhaps it doesn't need to, but there is just something that is not striking the right note so to speak LOL.  I'll get there.

I will just quote something @Thatguy v2.0 has said to me: sometimes it's the music needs it, even though you may not like it. For me the ending Buria is perfect in this way to end the suite in this manner! The suite is moving forward all the time, and having a static and earthly finale featuring thick chords is a great ending and contrast to the whole suite!

2 hours ago, Mark101 said:

My hopes, in posting (what really is an unpolished version) of the suite, or indeed any of my work, here is to get help with where the polish needs to be applied.  I am now working on the smallest details and you have been invaluable in this process, so I want to thank you very much for your time and your kind words, they mean a lot. 

I will be very happy if I can offer a little help to pieces I love!

Henry

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Thank you once again Henry.  You are probably right with the D thing.  It was my first instinct but then for some reason I thought I needed to divirge a little but possibly I don't.  I'm going to listen to both versions and see who I feel.

The only thing I've done to Berria is to slow it a little more and delay it's entrance.  I'm happy with it musically I think, it just needs a little more finesse in some small areas but essencially will remain the same.

Regards

Mark

 

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