waltz in f minor

https://youtu.be/Q6EBk0Pz6fs

my seventh composition, would more than love to hear feedback 

It would be helpful to see a score.  There's a certain charm to the piece, but also some harmonic awkwardness in places.  But for just your seventh composition, it's quite promising!

thank you for the reply, and here 😛

Simple motives are the best, and you've got a good one going.

If you're able and not sick of it, I'd really try to take this piece and develop it (not necessarily expand it), because there's a lot that could be done here, especially since you're so early in the learning process.

1. It's good that your main motive has rhythmic variation, but I'm not always so certain that it's intentional. For instance, the version we hear at the beginning sounds cleaner to me as the kind you have in mm. 35 and 39. The variation you have in the F minor section between straight eighths and the dotted figures is nice, though.
2. A couple jumps in technique that sound a little abrupt, talking about mm. 21 and 44. It's a pretty substantial change and it doesn't feel like it's supported well enough to me. A bigger lead in/out or a pattern change in the left hand could help with that.
3. The resolution at m. 56 jumps out to me as a little odd; it's plagal in A-flat major, but coming off of VI in the original key makes it feel a little sudden because you have two tonic-functioning chords in a row. Your bass counterpoint in that phrase is very smooth, so use that to your advantage and really sell that modulation melodically; I don't think you have to be so harmonic about it.
4. I'm not entirely sure what you want to do with the end section. The chromatic lines against the new tonic are pretty cool (I think some people call them line clichés, but I don't remember), but it's an entirely new key, so I'd take the extra time to really justify that big change. You've got a decent start to an idea, but it's not just repetition that makes things sound proper, but the time and space to make those things feel worth it. 
5. In that vein, I'd also let yourself develop the melody more. You have two distinct sections in two different keys (the waltz part at least) with a decently strong melodic idea; I can tell you know that it needs more variation because of the flourishes and stuff I mentioned in Point 2, but what if you made those variations two or four or eight or sixteen bars or a whole new section... you see where I'm going with this? There's a fine line between developing an idea and wasting the audience's time and I'd encourage you to try to explore what that line is.

Like I said, great ideas; I'm excited for this and you!

On 8/27/2025 at 1:05 PM, Aiwendil said:

It would be helpful to see a score.  There's a certain charm to the piece, but also some harmonic awkwardness in places.  But for just your seventh composition, it's quite promising!

 

You know...I was just about to ask for this. LOL. 

On 8/27/2025 at 3:23 PM, Tunndy said:

thank you for the reply, and here 😛

 

PDF

• waltz in f minor op.7

I will have listen and look over this weekend and next week: and then write my review following that. 

Review of Waltz in f minor: 

Melody: 

I love the charming, simple melody you have in the foreground. However...as a listener, it is bit repetitive. You have established basic idea from the start well. But, you need contrast against. The audience needs to go "awe" and be able to listen piece from start to finish. This is why we have melodic form and structure.  It just needs to flow logically and have contrast.   Furthermore, you don't normally see that rhythm pattern in waltz.  It nice to hear something different, but it makes us wonder is this a waltz or something else. Reconsider that.   At m. 21, those 16th might be too difficult for pianist to perform. I know you were trying use what chopin what would have use, but he was very talented, and pianist today...their hands hurt. Trust me. 

Harmony: 

through out the entire piece, the harmony does not adventure too far away from key. (i.e. mainly diatonic). I feel that it would be better if there were chromatism with harmony and the piece modulates. 

Form:

I am not sure what form is...