Nocturne No. 1

Hi, this nocturne is rather simple, and it was intended that way. Sure, I love the subtle complexity of Chopin, but I find it difficult to find any piece that is simple yet as elegant. So I figured I would go ahead and try to create one myself.

I used a I, IV, vii, ii, V progression through the piece. The melodic line is slow and subtle, powered by the always moving bass line. I am beginner, so I don't really know what kind of effect this usually creates.

Download: MP3, Score

I hope you enjoy this piece. Thanks for your time!

Firstly, I enjoyed it. Secondly, I didn't really feel a theme was present. Establish a theme and then work off of that. Maybe change up the left hand a bit. I think it would be neat if you created a different section that started after you have that accidental RH section, so it would be right after 28. The different section could include more accidentals, and maybe a more rapid pace.

Just some thoughts, and what you have is good. It's just lacking in some parts.

Chopin's nocturnes usually had a more turbulent middle before reaching a climax and it would then return to the first theme. Maybe you could do a similar thing and add some variety to your piece.

Your composition is very nice however.

I like the texture you created, but I thought it could have been more interesting harmonically during some parts. The beginning was beautiful, and I think you succeeded in making the nocturne elegant.

The overall rate is : 4.3 / 5 :laugh:

IMO your piece is good, but the left hand is always the same, I mean you started C - G - E - G - D - G, then when the right hand starts you change the left hand depending on the right hand, I mean if the first note in the measure is G you change the left hand to be G - D - B - D - A - D which lead to a lack in harmony. IMO you should vary the left hand, and for the right hand the melody is very simple but nice, which makes your problem in the left hand only.

GOOD JOB

A simple nocturne, to be sure, but one that shows a lot of promise in terms of compositional ability. Instead of commenting on how you might make it more complex (a thing that will come with time and experience as you learn more about music), I will comment on how you might consider working with what you have.

First of all, a four-bar intro is just too much. I don't think dear Chopin himself ever did a Nocturne intoduction more than two bars. My suggestion is to cut it down to two.

Please try this for me. I want to illustrate a point. Take bars 15-25, and change the left hand to just quarter notes, using whatever note is on the beat (in other words, eliminate every other note). Play this reduced version and see if anything strikes your ear as odd. For example, if you do this with bar 16 you'll get some awkward-sounding parallel fifths, and in bar 24 you'll have a minor seventh, a perfect fourth, and then a minor seventh -- not a very convincing progression of dissonance. The point here is that you should learn to pay more attention to the details of how your melody is interacting with your accompaniment. Of course Chopin was a master of this. His left-hand steady accompaniments are never just "filler" notes: these notes interact with the melody in ways that create fresh, unexpected, and often beautiful harmonies.

Also, the right-hand line at bars 26-28 introduces Eb and Ab to the piece. This gives the impression that the piece is modulating to a new key (perhaps Ab major) yet it jumps right back into C major in bar 29. This is especially shocking since the note immediately preceding bar 29 is an Eb (not a note of C major).

Also, is there a reason you chose to end the piece with a first-inversion chord, rather than a nice, strong root position triad? Just curious.

These are the main comments I have. Like I said, this is a solid starting effort, and if you keep it up I could see you composing some truly beautiful piano music in the future.

gentle and sensitive, liked very much!

It's not bad. But there were some parts where I felt it would(or should) modulate to minor, or at least some color change(about 0.35), but it wasn't there, and when you actually modulated, it didn't sound too good.

BTW the first few bars of the right hand reminds me of Maksim's "claudyne". :laugh:

Comletely agree with Josek Yung. The middle needed to be more hearty and thick (for lack of better terms.) Also maybe the ending could be a bit this way as well. It sounds a little transparent, and I would love for it to be a stronger finish. Overal: peaceful, and worth a listen.

Your piece has a calm, charming feel to it. Sometimes it's nice to hear a charming simple piece, it also sounds like something I could play perhaps at a recital. I'ld like to hear more of your pieces as you learn about composition. There were places that more emphasis could have been added, but as you get better, transitions and other things mentioned will become easier. Good work, and keep writing!

First of all, sorry for the extremely delayed reply (four months!). I simply could not find the time and motivation to compose. Of course, I am still very busy right now, with college admission and AP test preparations. I will be finished in a couple of weeks, however, and I hope to finally get back to composing. I might actually go for a Composition minor, if that's allowed by the Computer Science department.

Secondly, thank you for all your comments and suggestions. I will take all of them to heart. I'm now almost done my first real Music Theory class (high school AP Music Theory), and looking back at this piece, I see a lot of places that can be fixed.

@Rafn: You are right, I don't really have a theme present. The simple left hand pattern was more of a "safety feature," if you will, of my novice self. Now that I know more about music theory, I will attempt to modify the LH a bit.

@aerlinndan: I do not know why I did a four-measured intro. I now realize that my ears had always yearned for the intro to end after measure two.

When I wrote this, I did not even realize that P5's were "illegal." I'll do what you suggested. As for the vii, IV, vii, I will look for a more powerful progression.

The lack of a modulation was partly done on purpose, but I have no good reason of why I did that. I suppose I was just trying things out. I'll see what I can do with this.

I also don't know why I did not end with a root chord; probably lack of music theory training. Actually, it was to make the hand movement easier and to contrast with the right hand movement, but I will rethink that ending.