Begining of my first big thing

yer... sz i dont know if you allowed to post only a section of music.. u can delete if its not allowed buit just want a few peeps to just check it and see what i shud do to change and what i shud do in the part after i finish.. i have sorta got the subject A which is all the augmented 4ths at begining and then the tune in Bmajor is subject B. please comment :thumbsup: and check out Mahlerians piece its R0ks

Symphony.mid

Very good. I like it a lot.

I am intruiged. The begining sounds a bit rough though. I absolutely love subject B. I think the begining is a little to abrasive for the rest of the composition. Try making it sound a little more "The Sound of Music" and a little less "The Nightmare Before Christmas." Just for the begining. I love the second part. You dont have to listen, I mean its your work so...just a few things that I would do.

hmm my attmpet was to have two totally different contrasting sections, im in agreement the melody of section B came as i improvised on the violin, i gurantee you it sounds wonderful on the violin, but i wanted section A to be particularly hmm lets say difficult on the ear and angluar, i beelive im far away from my desired effect but i didnt want it all similar, so then the emergence of the section B in contrast to this dark section A makes it even more happy :toothygrin:

up to 0:18 i quite enjoyed, but i really didn't like the dissonence that followed, 0:32 - 0:44 was my favourite part so far, theme B sounded quite fantasy -ish, may have been the fault of the horrible midi harp :w00t:

overall, I liked some of it, but I really need to hear more to comment properly, keep at it!

Reminds me a little bit of Uematsu...

ive updated it... ive take on board, ive taken out that stupid disharmony in that bar and tried to smoothen it up.. ive added a little more towards the end adding more of Theme A after the theme B

Symphony_1.mid

Keep going. I won't say too much because theres not too much there.

I liked the overall sound, especially the ending. Keep developing it but don't add too much more subject matter (themes) or I think I would get lost in it. It was hard for me to recognize certain things as they repeated.

anger me? lol this is why i posted it for feedback, yes well the harp part is i guess similar to it, however different in a way that its not the same chord progression. it is based on the 7th chords but this is common in many pieces. yes i doubt this piece will be great but it is given me the opportunity to understand what sounds good together etc... :dry:

i think ive actually finished it... ;) im happy with it at the moment i know its like not a very high standard but for me i think ive done alot of improving and got alot better.. i would still like information because im no where like ok thats it put it to bed.., but as far as content is done ive got all of what i want.. possible i might need to explore more of the themes but im not sure how.. any responses is very gratefull. also im going to start the second movment any suggestions?

it was done in about 3-4 days

its the bottom one thats the finished one 42.4KB

Symphony_1.mid

Symphony_1fgf.mid

Reminds me a little bit of Uematsu...

LITTLE?!

I'd say that violinboy is very influenced by him :P

To the piece:

I like your themes, you have great ideas, the problem is that you don't really variate them enough. For example, the first theme (in your updated version) I can see that you have tried to make it longer; and by the way the transition the second theme is much smoother! ;)

What I think you should do is 'tie the bag', a swedish expression, what you do is that you complete everything you have started; which in this case you have not really succeeded.

Ok, enough with that complaints, you have very nice themes very like Uematsu, as Hands stated. Your usage of the harp is wonderful, and you can really catch the listeners attention! :D

Keep up the good work!

thanks yer i get what u mean maybe return to a theme and 'finish it' yes i totally agree, but ive given up right now on this movmenment starting the second, perhaps coming ack to it later with fresh ideas will be better than keep 'forcing it' i can only take it as a compliment if parts of my music sound like uesmetsu, but that such a cliche lol but i guess its ok thanks very much.. u got ne pieces of yours i can reveiw?

Hmmm. Way too many good ideas. =) They don't feel together in my opinion.

Its really sporadic. Pick a couple of them and develop them more.

Mystery and then suddenly your in fairy land and then you end up in Mystery again. Then suddenly theres a sadness in fairy land. Suddenly Your on an adventure. Suddenly Mystery. Back to... wait theres a funny looking guy holding a fiddle in the road and somehow ontop of a roof aswell. Suddenly Now a new fairy land. HAPPY ENDING.

You could write a half hour of music based off all these things. I would bet it would be pretty good too.

The road you take to get there is just as important as where your going.

I'm with Nico exept, I'd like to see the middle sections developed a little more. The harp is what made it magical to me.

Mystic at the beggining. mightful at the outset. keep going the major mode and come back to the darky moody of the beggining

Yes, I do feel that there's a lot more development to be had...I'm not good at developing; I think that's what I must do next.